Ex-P*rn Star Exposes the Dirty Secrets of the P*rn Industry

three head hunters from [music] the porn

industry. They said, "Hey, um, would you

ever do porn?" And I didn't have a good

reason to say no, so I said yes.

>> Could you share with us some of those

statistics of how many people are

struggling with this?

>> 88% of men within the church struggling

with porn at least once a month.

>> 88%

>> 88% and then 68% of women. If you take

the NBA, Netflix, and [music] Disney,

the totality of their revenue in 2024,

it was $153 billion. pornography [music]

that same year, $172

billion.

>> The person who thinks that it's

harmless, what would you say to them?

>> If you take a CT [music] scan of

someone's brain who has been watching

hardcore pornography for over 10 years,

there are tracks visible on a CT scan.

There's real damage that's been done to

your brain. My wife and I were walking

through a tough season. We go to the ER

and this just rocked our world. I just

wanted to be so strong, but like when I

saw that image, I lost it.

>> Back in October, me and my wife went

through the same thing. She didn't stop

bleeding. She had lost way too much

blood.

>> I think there was [music] something so

practical in this, and this is really

what I want the audience to hear.

Welcome to the Nicholas Bowling Podcast.

Today we have with us Joshua Broom, who

used to be one of the top stars in the

porn industry, but has been radically

transformed by God. you're going to want

to stick around to hear his story. Right

before we get into that if you want to

help this reach more people, the best

way you can do that is by leaving a

five-star review on Apple or Spotify.

And if you're watching or listening on

YouTube, make sure to like and

subscribe. Today we have with us Joshua

Broom. Joshua, it's great to have you

on.

>> Hey, thanks for having me.

>> Well, we can start out. Can you tell us

a little bit about your life right now?

Kind of where God has you, if you have a

wife, if you have kids. Yeah. Just give

us the spill.

>> Yeah. So, I I've been married to my

wife, Hope, for it'll be 10 years this

July. So, we're super excited about

that. And we've got four boys. So,

Canon, Lincoln, Judah, and Abel. So,

four little boys, uh, 7, six, four, and

two. So, life is busy. It's pretty

crazy, but [laughter] it's the best,

man.

>> Four boys, I bet.

>> Yeah. And then I have the opportunity to

to serve for two different ministries.

So, I'm on staff at the American

Association of Christian Counselors. So,

I oversee um, Walkorthy. So, it's a

subdivision of that. So we develop

resources and preach sermons based on

what the Bible says about sex, intimacy,

relationships, and walk worthy is born

out of Ephesians 4. So talking about

walking worthy, the calling received in

Christ Jesus. And I love that Paul says

27 times before that, it's like man,

your identity is based on who Jesus

Christ is.

>> So it's like, man, if you if you

understand who Jesus is, you can

understand who you are and that'll

impact how you live. And uh so and I

serve also at Exom Marriage. So just

developing resources for hey what is

what is God's plan for marriage? What is

sex, you know, based on what the Bible

says. So

>> that's the the path that God has me on

and I travel and preach a ton.

>> Just kind of diving into your background

a little bit. Um

>> even with what you're doing right now,

it's almost the flip side of some of

your background, but could you tell us a

little bit about your background? Um,

yeah. And and and what that looks like

all the way up to, you know, you

encountering Jesus. Yeah. And, uh, and

where he's got you at now.

>> Yeah. Um, so I I I love sharing this in

that uh I just want to like start with

how I grew up because it it impacted how

I live my life. So, I grew up in a small

town in South Carolina, like one gas

station, one grocery store, like super

small town. And my mom and dad both were

15 when I was born. And even though I

knew where my dad was in that small

town, I never had a relationship with

him. He was never in my life. And this

the complexity of not understanding

that, like knowing who he was and where

he was, that didn't make sense to me as

a kid. So the way I made sense of it

was, man, I I must be insignificant or

broken or not good enough in some way.

So that kind of set me on this journey

of trying to do enough and become enough

and earn enough and build enough and you

know win enough so that I would feel

like I was enough. And then at 12 years

old I saw pornography for the first time

and I didn't have a biblical foundation

of what what does the Bible say about

sex, intimacy, relationships. Um I never

had a conversation about sex. So I

didn't have an example of what does it

even look like to have you know a mom

and a dad in a house or any relationship

at all. And you know like Romans 12:2

talks about the world conformed me to

its image and it was my teacher and then

I lost my virginity soon after that was

you know struggling with pornography

addiction soon after that and that led

into college and you know I was in a

fraternity and played college basketball

and you know had ample opportunities to

to live in sin even though those things

are not sinful necessarily but the the

brokenness that I had and the lack of

knowledge that I had impacted how I live

my life and then um I was studying

theater initially and that you know I

started acting and modeling and as a

teenager and I thought if I moved in

closer proximity to the industry I

wanted to be in then that would be

advantageous for me and so that's what I

did and I had a [clears throat] a

manager and had opportunities and stuff

like that and I was I was doing pretty

good. I was I was having more success

modeling than acting even though I just

wanted to act. And um when I was right

after I turned 22, I was at a bar and

three head hunters from the porn

industry um that you know pretty girls

that would go out looking for attractive

guys, attractive girls came up to me and

they said, "Hey, um would you ever do

porn?" And um you know not not to get

you know not to start preaching already

but I think it's that's why it's so

important if you don't have a good

reason to say no you will say yes to

something intellectually you know you

should say no to there there's something

in you like and Romans 1 talks about

that God has made himself evident in his

creation and there's just something

inside of you like if you're in a

library and someone sends you something

inappropriate you you instinctually flip

your phone upside down there's something

in you that knows that it's wrong. At

the same time, there's something in you

that wants to look and can't look away.

And I didn't have a good reason to say

no. So, I said yes to their offer. And I

met with this agent and he, you know,

essentially he he asked me three

questions. And I would say the most

interesting question is the first thing

he asked me, he asked me, "How did I

grow up?" So, it was a is a value

proposition.

>> Wow.

>> It's like I'm I'm looking for brokenness

in your life. you know, ammunition to

use against you to manipulate you to get

you to do what I want. So, essentially,

he's like, man, he's got, you know, this

absent, you know, this the the absence

of a father in his life cuz I was like,

it just I grew up pretty much me and my

mom.

>> He's like, perfect and, you know, he's

like, you know, I I I see value in you

and you can be successful and, you know,

you're awesome and and all this stuff

that I I wanted to hear from my dad. So

I I said yes to doing a film and that

film quickly blew up my life. My mom

found out about it. You know, being from

a small town only takes one person to

know one thing for everybody to know

everything.

>> Yeah.

>> And so like someone told my uncle at

work and then my uncle told my mom and

my mom called me and you know being from

the south you know it's like how much

your name gets used how much trouble

you're in. So yeah you know I heard

Joshua Luke Broom like did you did you

do X Y and Z and and unfortunately yes

mom I did. and just had so much shame.

And then that decision also caused me to

get fired from the the the mainstream

management that I had. And then all of a

sudden I I for some reason I thought the

only path forward is to continue doing

what I did. And that's what I did. So I

stayed in that industry for um almost a

little over six years. And um I left

after making a lot of money and having a

lot of success. But it those things

didn't give me what I thought they

would. Cuz I thought that it would give

me validation. I thought it would make

the pain in my heart go away. I thought

it would make me being affirmed by

others would make me not feel overlooked

by my dad. And when the stuff and status

didn't quiet the wrestling I had in my

heart, in my head, I really struggle

with suicidal ideiation. And then fast

forward um end up leaving that industry

and uh two years after leaving that

industry I I'm working at this gym and I

I see this pretty girl with wearing

she's wearing Iowa Hawkeye everything.

She was a cheerleader and um asked her

on a date. She said no lunch no coffee

no. And you know everything no. And then

one day maybe she just got tired of me

asking. She was like well I go for a

long run on Sundays before church and

you can meet me there if you want. and

>> to go on a run or church?

>> Yeah. To go for a run.

>> Oh, okay.

>> To go for a run. And I get there and I'm

thinking, man,

>> that's a cool first date.

>> Yeah. Yeah. [laughter] Yeah. And I'm

thinking like, man, um, she doesn't she

doesn't know my backtory. There's no way

she would have agreed to this cuz this

girl's perfect. And, um, for some reason

I thought, man, if she if she finds out

who I am, she's going to hurt me or like

I'm going to feel foolish. So,

>> I'm going to what I had been doing for a

long time, like a lot of self-sabotage

where someone would get close to me or a

friendship or something. I I just felt

like if someone saw me for who I was,

then they would either leave me or not

want to, you know, continue.

>> Wow.

>> Um, so I just thought I'm going to tell

her

>> took you deeper like like you getting

involved with the the adult film

content, all that. It took you deeper in

the what you felt as a child.

>> Oh, sure.

>> Wow.

>> Yeah. Um, but I I thought, man, I'm

gonna, you know, this is not great

dating advice, you know, but I was just

like, here's this fiveminute monologue

of every bad thing I've ever done, you

know. I'm just like, you know,

>> so you spilled it. You didn't try to lie

and cover it up.

>> Oh, no. I was like, I this kid that his

daddy didn't want, and I've done X, Y,

and Z, and I've even done all this

pornography, and it's on the internet

for the world to see. This is, and I

think it's so interesting because I use

the language like, this is who I am.

And she was, you know, obviously pretty

taken back by that. She's like, you

know, are you still doing this stuff?

And I'm like, no, it's been two years.

Um, but then,

>> so you told her on this first run that

you guys were on, you just spill the

beans.

>> Okay. Like while you're running or

>> we never we were still like quad

stretching like we never even like made

[laughter] it cuz like when she got

there, it's like I'm like practicing

what I'm going to say to her, you know?

>> Okay. So you you opened up with that?

>> Yeah.

And um but but I told her all that and

then um but after she she figured out

that you know it had been a while since

I'd done that

she just kind of you know we just like

walked in silence and it felt like

forever and then she stopped and she

looked at me and got really serious and

she was like hey I don't want to

minimize what you said to me and I don't

want to pretend like I can relate to

your relationship with your dad. can't.

And I don't want to make you think that

I'm saying that your decisions didn't

have real consequences.

But what is true is you're not defined

by the worst thing you've ever done. And

you won't be defined by the greatest

thing you ever do because you're not the

author of you. God is. Do you know him?

And I didn't. And she invited me to

church. And I walk into church and

>> the same day.

>> Uh no. So this was um it was the same

week.

>> Okay. Gotcha.

>> Yeah. So this was the this is the So I

didn't go to church with her that

Sunday, but the the following week that

was upcoming on Easter. So we went to an

Easter service on

>> um on a Saturday night and

the interesting Easter sermon, but he

was preaching on 2 Samuel chapter 9. And

um it was it was talking about the grace

that David offered Mphibbeeth. And um I

I love just navigating through that

text, but like you you you get to this

point where MBA is thinking, you know,

he he's in Loabar hiding because he

thinks that death is coming his way. You

know, he's at this dude Makir's house

and he he's in Loabar, which means place

of no pasture, and he's he's hiding. And

Zeba, who is a guard who served under

Saul and now serves under David, he he

finds him and he brings him before him.

And but Febra thinks, you know, it's

it's it's D-Day, you know, historically

that if if you were a remaining family

member from a royal family, then you

were seen as a threat and you were

killed.

>> And that's what he thought was going to

happen. instead, you know, you got you

got justice, you know, when when we when

we get what we deserve and mercy, the

withholding what we deserve and then

grace, this unmmerited favor that we

don't deserve. And that's what David

did. He he offered grace. He said, "Hey,

I want to give you back your

grandfather's land. I want to invite you

into my kingdom and I want to give you a

seat at my table." And I was just

mesmerized by what was what I was

hearing. And then I heard something that

man I I I resonated with so much because

the way that my fellow chef responded

was, "What do you want with a dead dog

like me?"

>> And I was like, "Yeah, that's me." I was

like, "Grace, that sounds cool for

whoever that's for,

but you don't know what I've done. You

My own dad didn't want me. You know, you

don't you don't know how many people

I've hurt. You don't know how many like

my sin is, you know, evident. You know,

it's it's tangible. you can find it. Um,

and then he went from there to Hebrews

12:2. And there was something about

that. Um, Hebrews 12:2 talking about the

joy set before him and pointing to

Hebrews 58, uh, Romans 5'8. It's just

like, man,

God being all knowing and all powerful

that he he freely lays his life down, no

one takes it from him, and he therefore,

while we were still sinners, he dies for

us. um knowing that in spite of me, he

died for me and Holy Spirit rocked me

and the only thing that made sense for

me to hit my face and repent of my sin

and make Jesus my Lord

>> and my savior and that day changed my

life. And um but that girl, her name's

Hope, which is pretty cool.

>> And you know, we've been we married for

almost 10 years. And um I what I love

about that is that church, you know,

this was a Saturday. On a Monday, I go

and knock on the church and it's like my

whole life, you know, I've been trained

to trained to to communicate or to play

basketball. And it's like I had, you

know, an agility coach and a, you know,

a speaking coach and all these coaches

and I went to the church and I was like,

man, um I need a Jesus coach, you

[laughter] know, um because I I craved

constructive criticism because anything

I wanted to pursue, I wanted to do it to

the best of my abilities. And I know

that um I can't be the best version of

me if I don't have someone coaching and

critiquing me. So I mean I I wanted to

know, man, if if you say that the word

of God is as valuable as you're saying

it is, man, I I want to know it. I want

to understand it. So is there someone to

teach me, you know, what it means and

how to study it and how to read it and

how to apply it to my life? And um there

was this man, Andrew Yates, who still

disciples me to this day. And um I went

into his office and he's like, "Man, if

I'm honest, I intended to, you know,

just give you a Bible, tell you to read

the book of John and get you plugged

into a small group, but I felt

conviction from the Holy Spirit to to

pour my life out to you." And and I was

kind of marinating on this verse even

while I was waiting to get there where

in First Thessalonians, it talks about

that they they didn't just share the

scriptures with one another. They shared

their very own lives with one another up

until death. And he's just like, man,

this guy needs to sh me to show him what

does what does it mean to be a man of

God? What does it look like to to be a

friend, you know, for your yes to be yes

and your no to be no? Like what does it

mean to walk in integrity? What does it

look like to to be a father? What does

it look like to be a husband? Like what

does it look like to to navigate

conflict? And um he didn't he may have

not known like how like, you know, all

in I was willing to go. He's like, "Man,

I want to give you as much time as as

you would make yourself available." So,

I ended up spending about 15 to 20 hours

a week with him for almost two years.

>> And then I ended up going to Liberty and

getting a theological education. But,

um, like that man changed my life and I

still meet with him every Friday.

>> Before we jump back into our

conversation, if you're led to partner

with the ministry, you can do that at

nicholasbing.com/partner.

And if you want to share the gospel with

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shipping at nicholasbing.com.

Even speaking of that, I'm sure that's

such a huge part of your journey. I

mean, it was the way that Jesus

discipled people. Yeah.

>> You know, he had the thousands and then

he had, you know, the 12. We see a

little bit more even beyond the 12. You

know, there was some women who were

constantly hanging around. Mary

Magdalene, some of them.

>> Yeah.

>> Um and then we see, you know, the three

>> that he's taken up on the mountain to

pray. he's taken in to raise, you know,

the little girl from the dead. How

important was disciplehip for you? Uh,

as far as where do you think you would

be now if you didn't have personal

disciplehip and you had just been

somebody who showed up on Sundays? Yeah,

I I think the analogy that he uses is

that, you know, um

think about a white t-shirt that you

know is old and if if it was across the

room, it would like oh that there's

nothing wrong with that white t-shirt,

but the closer you get to the light, you

know, if the room was dark and there was

a lamp in the corner and the closer you

got to that light, it's like, oh,

there's, you know, there's some stains

on that shirt, there's some holes in

that shirt, there's some fringes in that

shirt. And it's impossible for see

oursel as we are unless you know the

word of God like I love Hebrews 4:12 it

talks about you know it's it's sharper

than a double-edged sword you know bone

and mirror soul and spirit and it it I

love that even it even says that it

discerns the desires and intentions of

your heart you know not not not just

what you do but why you do what you do

if someone is critiquing me in love and

I feel offended by that then there's

something that I need to deal with in

me,

>> there's something off. Um, but I I just

want I was just hungry to grow and I

just I was desperate.

>> I mean, if I'm honest, I I I live my

whole life with this mindset, man. Um, I

don't know who I am, but I just know

that I don't want to be me.

>> Something else that I've really seen

about being guarded and not being open

and having those people in our lives uh

to be there with us is it's almost like

carrying your burdens alone. Yeah,

>> you know, Jesus, he did say, "My yoke is

easy and my burden is light and we're

yolked together with him." But then

there's this other aspect again where

it's not just me and Jesus alone. Yeah.

>> But he made us the body of Christ and he

said to bear one another's burdens.

>> Yeah.

>> So I think sometimes uh I found myself

doing this as well in my life before

>> where I'm trying to bear it all alone. I

don't have those other people to bear

the burdens. And because of that, it it

starts to steal my joy.

>> Yeah.

>> Uh it starts to affect my mood. I I'll

be edgy or frustrated or this or that.

And it's almost like it kind of bogs you

down. And a lot of people still know,

you know, when they get around

believers, Christians are going to

church, a small group, whatever they're

doing. Uh they know how to put that

smile on. And you know, a blessed,

highly favored brother, you know, um

that people know how to go through that

spill. And honestly, I've caught myself

in the same thing where and I'm not

saying just even on the sin side. I'm

saying even with the just the burdens

you have to carry, the responsibilities

that you have, the challenges that

you're facing, the people that you're

dealing with, you know, overcoming or

making right decisions, the the weight

of responsibility, you know, whereas if

we're doing what you're saying, which is

tied to the scriptures, Yeah. um of

having those other people in our life,

even the personal disciplehip side of

disciplehip, uh how important that is.

It's it's lightening the load. It's

taking those burdens off and you're

bearing them with one another. And it

makes it a whole lot easier

>> to continue to move forward and and

finish our race, run our weight race

well.

>> My wife and I were walking through a a

tough season. My wife was was 12 weeks

pregnant and um so we we took our family

to Iowa and she called I she like drop

them off, fly back to Dallas and I I

wake up and I've got all these missed

calls and it's my wife and she's not

feeling well and I I bring her home and

um we go to the ER and Um

this doctor just walks in. It's like,

"Man, that you're there's no heartbeat."

And um I didn't know how to feel and we

had no we we just thought, you know, she

was just, you know, bleeding or

whatever. We had no clue like what was

happening. And um

and then we go to, you know, the OB and

you know, the baby's not in the womb and

we we we never got to see the baby. We

were going to do like a we had a a

midwife. We're going to do an at home

birth and feel guilty, confused, and

hurt and angry. And um and God's not

afraid of our questions. He's not afraid

of our doubt. And there there is this

inclination to say,

well, it is true that that child's in

heaven. We we we can say that with

confidence because the gospel is not

something to make us feel better. It's

truth to cling on to.

Yet, God doesn't expect me not to be

hurt and frustrated because sin wasn't

his plan either.

And

I tried to be really strong for my wife

and um

it's still hard. It was almost a month

ago and it's still hard and um

we never saw imagery. But then she

called the ER and um they had imagery

and they they sent us this like old

school like CD and we were like what

what the heck do we do with this, you

know? [laughter] And we like we had to

buy something off of Amazon like just to

connect it to my computer.

>> Yeah.

>> And and um and uh

I was scared to see it, man.

>> I was scared to see our baby because I

knew that that baby was in her womb but

not alive.

And but she needed to see it for

closure. And um

I try to be, you know, I I I didn't have

a dad to show me how to be a dad.

And sometimes it's like, man, I you

know, we we always say like broom boys

don't give up. You know, try to be tough

and resilient and, you know, we're kind

to mama. We serve mama. We protect mama.

Um but what does it look

like to hurt? you know, um because if

I'm honest, man, like like yeah, there's

per there's significant persecution and

all that stuff, but man, we've had such

a good life.

Um so blessed

and

this just rocked our world. And I just

wanted to be so strong, but like when I

saw that image,

I lost it.

And I wept and I wept and I wept and I

was not okay. Um, and if

the reality is God has a plan for my

pain and Satan has a plan for my pain

and Satan's plan for my pain was for me

to to to pretend like I was okay or

dwell on it or deflect, distract,

medicate, cope, cover up. Um,

and that that can look like a lot of

different things. But I say all that to

say it's even in that like if I didn't

have men that I had the equity with

where I could call and spend time with

and say, "Man, I'm hurting and

I don't know what to do." I know that

probably had little to do with what you

were initially asking me, but I think

it's just like, man, all our desires and

emotions are God-given, but where they

take us are not always God- ordained.

And if we're not willing to invite

people into the intricacies of our life,

we will end up in a place we never

intended to be. Mhm. I'm glad you went

there and that that the Lord's leading

us there. Uh because back in October, me

and my wife went through the the same

thing.

>> Um where

>> I'm sorry, man.

>> Yeah. Yeah. It's uh Appreciate it.

>> Um it it was tough. It was [snorts]

tough for me as well. So anyway, some

other things happened and we found out

that uh that there was no heartbeat as

well. Um and I think she was around the

10 week uh or or so. My initial response

was um

>> almost sweep it under the rug. Um and

like

>> just keep going, just keep doing what

we're what what we need to do, you know,

just keep moving forward in the will of

God.

>> Yeah.

>> Um I I was supposed to be traveling like

two days after we found out and she

hadn't passed anything yet. Um

>> so I I'm just thinking I'm just going to

keep doing the will of God. I'm not

going to let the enemy hold me back,

stop me, anything like that. Um, but I I

I had men of God in my life. Um, my my

father-in-law was there, also my my

brother-in-law. Um, but, uh, it took me

a little bit to to for it to hit me.

Yeah.

>> Um, for me to let it really sink in um,

and to to to bring it before the Lord

um, and not just to move past it and

just act like it didn't happen. Um

because it it is I I I don't think I I

think the way the world makes

miscarriages uh seem is they are just a

fetus in the womb or oh yeah you're just

going to pass it this and that almost

takes a life from it but it's a child.

>> All life is a gift regardless of if it's

10 11 12 weeks or 2 years old.

>> Even with that you know the the Bible

says God works all things together for

good. Amen.

>> Um to those who love and are called

according to his purpose. So we we know

uh I I believe it was not God's will for

that to happen. Uh you know God didn't

form my child in uh my wife's womb and

then just for the purpose of 10 weeks in

for for those things to happen. You know

even a lot of people look look at Job.

Job lost all of his kids. You know he

knew them all. You know for me it's like

losing a child

>> that I didn't really have time to build

a relationship with. It's still a child.

you know, it's still my child that that

died, you know, and is [snorts] in

heaven. So, someday I'll get to meet

him. But we have to realize who was the

one behind even what happened with Job.

And it was the devil. Yeah. The devil

was the one causing the destruction. The

devil's the one doing that. But we do

see God's promise that he works all

things together for good take place in

Job's life. And I've seen that even, you

know, in my life with with this child

>> um that that I lost basically going

through that healing process.

>> Yeah.

being vulnerable with the Lord, letting

all that set in and not trying to push

it off, being real about it, being

authentic about it. For me, it was uh it

it wasn't just a child, but

>> uh I almost lost my wife in the mix of

it as well.

>> She started passing things u and she

didn't stop bleeding.

>> Oh wow.

>> She kept bleeding, kept going, and it

was through the middle of the night.

>> Um so then like kind of all at once, um

she had lost way too much blood. um

she's laying on the bathroom floor, you

know, I'm going in there, she's almost

passing out, blacking out, this and

that. We had a midwife. We were planning

to do a home birth as well. So, very

similar to what you're going through.

So, anyway, we we ended up calling the

ambulance. The ambulance came

um able to get her there. And when she

got there, um you know, I I guess they

they see things like this happen often,

but um and I'm not blaming anyone, but

they just the facts are that they didn't

take it that that serious. I don't think

they realized how much blood she had

lost.

>> Um, so they just kind of had her sitting

in a room on her own that they hadn't

let me come back there yet cuz I had to

drive. She went in the ambulance. Uh,

our kids were still asleep, so I had to

wait at our house for my, you know,

father-in-law, mother-in-law to come

before I could go there.

>> So, uh, so I get in there and she's like

kind of alone in the room, but she

started feeling bad again. She started

feeling lightheaded, this and that, like

she was going to pass out. And uh we

told the you know the nurses this and

that and I think uh she she started like

going out you know she started going

unconscious. Her face was you know super

pale.

>> Wow.

>> She had lost I don't know we we think

somewhere between like 2 to 2 and a half

lers of blood. I think a female only has

like four around 4ish 4.1 lers of blood.

>> So she had lost she she had lost a lot

of blood. Uh well, she she basically

went unconscious and was unconscious

for, you know, uh a few minutes while

they're rushing her on this bed over,

you know, to a different place in the

ER. Doctors are in. There's 12 nurses

running around the room. Um you know,

trying to figure out what to do. She she

actually ended up like vomiting. Uh

she's unconscious, pale, like vomits.

I'm sitting there, you know, I'm

praying. Um I'm praying there praying

for her. And uh I've seen all those

movies where it's like, you know,

something bad's happened and they're

like, "Sorry, sir. You got to get out of

the room." You know? Um [clears throat]

so I kind of I was hoping, okay, that

like they're not going to try to

forcefully remove you from the room.

>> So I kind of backed into a corner trying

to stay out of the way of 12 nurses

running around in a small room with a

doctor. So I was kind of trying to be

almost invisible back there while I

continue to pray for her to stay out of

the way. So hopefully they wouldn't say,

"Hey, get out of the room. You're in our

way."

So, uh, so you know, I'm sitting there

watching my my wife, um, her blood, um,

her heartbeat is dropping, you know, um,

they're trying to figure out they're,

you know, cutting her stuff off and

getting her hooked up with everything.

And,

>> um, you know, I mean, I like I said

throughout this whole thing, you know,

I'm trusting God or trying to my best,

you know, to to trust God to continue to

pray, decreeing those promises,

decreeing those scriptures, all those

things. Um but to to to one you know a

child dies and then here I am and my

wife you know so then they they bring in

blood and they do like a fast I guess

you can do like a slow uh I don't know

if they called a transfusion but where

they basically put blood in in uh in a

person uh they did it in a fast way um

and then she continued to to bleed

throughout the night um until the next

day they had to do a surgery u basically

what had happened is uh not not all the

baby He had passed.

>> So the way the body tries to pass it is

by continuing to bleed.

>> Oh wow.

>> Continuing to push like try to push it

all out with blood.

>> Yeah.

>> Um so because some was still up there um

she just wouldn't stop bleeding until

after she had the the surgery. So

anyway, it was uh it was uh and you know

I I was texting people you know her

parents and things like that you know

pray you know like this is very serious.

So just in the midst of all that um that

was huge. you know, you're you're you're

going through it to an extent, but

there's

>> there's the questions, there's the the

not understanding.

>> Yeah.

>> Um, but man, now that, like I said, that

happened back in October. Um, I haven't

talked to a lot of people about this.

Um, but I feel like the the Lord's kind

of bringing it out. I know of another uh

man of God who

>> um had something recently happen as well

with a with a miscarriage. But something

the Lord really taught me in the midst

of it was one,

>> I'm so grateful to have those men in my

life. Amen. who could embrace me and cry

with me, you know, weep with one

another.

>> Um, but to encourage me even to, uh, you

know, like I said, uh, I mean, even my

own dad as well. Um, but there's

different people in my life who, uh, I

have a brother-in-law, he's had four,

they had four, they have four kids, but

they had four miscarriages.

>> Wow.

>> Um, and, you know, he he gave me some

wisdom on, you know, spending time with

the Lord, uh, putting it all before him.

you know, the the big questions and also

taking time to to heal. So, there was a

time where I kind of pulled away from

things and didn't just keep,

>> you know, trucking forward, but just

took some time, me and my wife, and just

being with the Lord. And, [snorts] uh,

you know, some of the biggest things

that really the Lord helped me hold on

to is he's good.

>> Yeah.

>> And he's faithful.

>> Amen. No matter what, no matter what

we're going through, no matter what

we're feeling, no matter how hurt we

are, how much we don't understand, how

much the enemy is trying to get involved

in tint and everything. Um, man, those

two like strongholds in a good way.

>> Yeah.

>> He's faithful and he's good.

>> Yeah.

>> And man, the Lord just has been speaking

to me uh over and over again. You know,

I'm with you. I'm for you. Yeah.

>> Uh I love you. my plans for you are

good. They're not evil. Yeah.

>> So, sometimes um

>> I think we get in the midst of a

struggle or a trial or tribulation or

something that we're going through

>> and uh the enemy just tries to attack

that area, God's goodness, did did God

plan this? Did God do this?

>> Um because in in some twisted way, you

know, this is part of what he uh wants

you to go through to teach you something

this and that. He can teach us things

through those things. You know, he can

work it all together for good.

>> And that that was one of the things that

I'm glad you brought out. I see how he

works it to the good. And even at this

point in my life, you know, just a few

months later, um I look back on the

nearness of the Lord

>> in some of those moments where it was so

hard. Yeah. You know, uh and you're

questioning so much and just the pain

and all that we talked about. I look

back and see how near the Lord was.

>> Yeah.

>> How good he was in the midst. How, you

know, at times he was holding me, you

know? I mean, he always holds us, but

you know what I'm saying? Just embracing

me, holding me. And now, man, uh when I

when I'm worshiping God,

>> there's like a a new dynamic of how he

worked it to the good. But you know all

those songs and even the biblical

stories that oftentimes the worship and

praise songs are are identifying with or

or using to bring glory and praise to

God, adoration towards him, you know,

some of those struggles that we see of

the people in the Bible. Um I think

sometimes while I'm worshiping God, you

know, I'm singing of his goodness or I'm

singing of his faithfulness or I'm

singing of uh you know how awesome he

is. I think of of that moment which is

probably one of the most difficult

moments of my life. you know, being

there. I just lost a child and I'm

watching my wife like on the the the

brink of death. I praise God that she's

alive and that he didn't allow the enemy

um that he's greater than the enemy, you

know, cuz the devil would have liked to

to take out my wife,

>> but uh God is greater and he wasn't he

wasn't able to. I think that's why it's

so important to understand like the

totality of the meta narrative of

scripture where it's like yes, God is

good and he's sovereign, but we also

need to know that there's a real enemy

that really wants to destroy you and he

really wants to wage war against us and

and sin like he was the initiator of

sin. And I I think like understanding

all of that will allow you to to seek

God in it and not to blame him for it,

but to trust that even while it wasn't

his intention or his idea, he will use

that moment to draw you to himself. And

I can relate that a ton, man. I feel

like um my my worship is, you know,

there there's a there's a depth to it

that is new. Um even when I'm reading

his word, it's you know, it's more

vibrant.

>> Um and even, you know, the the the

sweetness with my wife, you know, we

we've always had a great relationship.

Praise God. But it's just like there's

just a there's just an in tune you know

we we or even more intentional to you

know let let's pray let's talk let's I

want to listen to her I care how she's

doing I care you know um there's just I

mean that's like intimacy is defined by

proximity you know and not not

[clears throat] just a perception of

proximity but literal proximity and I

think um both God has drawn me near more

near to him and the byproduct that is

I'm closer to my life

>> because of it. And if we take our

attention off the Lord because we're

hurting and we don't invite people into

it, well, you know, either we take our

thoughts captive or they going or are

they going to take us captive, you know?

So, it it's so important to have our

time with the Lord, but also inviting

other people into that struggle.

>> Yeah. Yeah. Amen. Speaking of uh the

Bible does talk about sin as uh you're a

slave to whom you obey.

>> Yeah. Amen. in. So sin can [snorts] uh

allow the enemy into our life, give him

a foothold, give him a place in our

lives, and he comes to steal, kill, and

to destroy. Yeah.

>> As I was coming to the Lord, you know, I

I have a similar background to you. I

didn't go into the adult film industry,

but I partied a lot. I went to college.

I was in a fraternity. Um sexual

immorality, a lot of that pornography

was a big part of my life. Um sleeping

around, all that stuff. Yeah.

>> Coming out of that,

>> you know, I found myself, the Lord

helped me overcome getting drunk. I used

to get drunk five times a week, you

know, helped me overcome smoking

marijuana. I used to smoke weed, you

know, for a time in my life every

morning when I woke up, took cocaine,

mushrooms, things like that. We uh the

Lord helped me overcome those things.

And I had even uh the Lord helped me

overcome sexual immorality. So, sleeping

around before marriage, uh different

things like that.

>> Uh and then there was pornography. Yeah.

Can you tell us a little bit about how

pornography because there's so many

people across America, probably across

the world, and even many people, the

percentage of people in the church.

Could you share with us some of those

statistics [clears throat] of how many

people are struggling with this and and

how it can really affect people in a

negative way?

>> Yeah, I mean, if if if you look at the

totality of it, if you take the NBA,

Netflix, and Disney, the totality of

their revenue in 2024, it was $153

billion. Well, globally, pornography

that same year, $172

billion. So, $19 billion more than three

very well-known entities. Wow.

>> So, that that paints a, you know, a

pretty clear story in that, you know,

regarding um data transferred on the

internet, around 33 to 35% of the data

transferred on the internet on a daily

basis worldwide is pornography.

>> Wow. you look at, you know, top, you

know, top 10 sites, you know, regarding

Google, three of the top 10 are

pornography. So that that's how how much

money it's making and that's how much

it's being searched out. And then you

look in the confines of the church. I I

did a project with Pure Desire in Bara

um also in 2024 2025 actually and we

pulled 3,500 churches and the data we

saw was that um regarding a um the age

demographic 18 to 25 8% of men within

the church struggling with porn at least

once a month.

>> 88%

>> 88% and then 68% of women.

>> Wow. Wow. And that, you know, the 18 to

25

>> in the church. That's not in the world.

This is in the church.

>> And it's so interesting. And um I I saw

a piece of data that's new. It said um

around 62%

of the general population views porn on

a monthly basis.

>> And I would it's and I say it's

interesting that you know, you think

about pornography, you know, that that

the word pornography comes from the

Greek word porna. what Paul's talking

about, it's like a junk drawer uh word

for all things sexual immorality. So, in

the same way that, you know, um maybe

the the the way in which you would

define pornography would be, you know,

hardcore pornography on a website, well,

if you use Jesus's standard from Matthew

5, well, um what you would see on

Netflix, what you would see, you know,

Tik Tok, certainly, you know, that that

there's people who, you know, read

erotic novels, like all these things.

Um, these are all inputs that are

polluting the way that you see people.

And and to your point, it's like it

teaches you to commodify people. It

teaches you instead of loving people and

using things, you begin to gravitate

towards using people and loving things.

And you know just what we see also I

think is so interesting that that data

shared that regarding men within the

church 3,500 churches uh 88% of them

said that pornography was the most

problematic thing regarding men within

the church. Yet in those same churches

only 8% of those churches had a

dedicated resource for pornography. And

then across all the data, everyone that

confessed that pornography was a problem

with them, 54% of them said they've

never told anyone.

No one knows.

>> Wow.

>> And I think that's that's why it's so

problematic in the church because

there's this reality that what we don't

says

something. And like in my home, if if we

never talk about sex, there's this

assumption that it's bad and we don't

talk about it.

>> So if I see it or experience it, then

there's an assumption

it's bad and we don't talk about it.

>> Right?

>> And I I think that's in some ways how we

got to where we are today because I mean

I'm a huge proponent of the local

church. like local the local church is

the way in which God wants to to

minister to the world. Um and we're to

be his hands and feet, you know. Um

but I think where we could do better and

where we maybe missed the mark is that

if we don't provide a clear theology of

what sex is and what God's intentions

for it and that he has boundaries for it

and a purpose for it. Like he's the

designer. He's called it good. And it's

only weird if we make it weird. And if

we don't talk about it, well, the world

is screaming about it. And we're we're

in a a day and time where like you don't

have to look for it. It's looking for

you. And you know, I I sit with parents

sometimes and it's like, man, when when

do I give like the kids a cell phone? I

want them to have access to, you know, I

want to be left behind. I want them to

have be able to, you know, navigate AI

and all this stuff. And it's like, man,

when you give a kid access to the

internet, like, sure, you're giving them

access to the world, but more

importantly, you're giving the world

access to them.

>> Yeah.

>> And and that should be, you know, that

that that should be a cause for concern.

>> I think something with within what

you're saying, you know, I think about

you said you were 12 years old when you

first started porn.

>> Yeah. Average of exposure now is 8 years

old.

>> What grade is that? 12 years old. Is

that seventh or eighth grade?

>> Yeah, like sixth or seventh grade. Yeah,

it was around the same exact time for

me. I was in seventh grade. Uh may have

been sixth grade, sixth or seventh

grade. And I was introduced to porn and

uh then, you know, it started from

there. Uh and in in school, we had sex

education our freshman year of high

school, but it was a worldly sex

education where they're showing you all

these pictures. We even watched a movie

in uh in school, I think my freshman

year,

>> of of women walking around topless.

What's crazy is um I don't want to take

us off course, but there are pretty much

in every I think in 40 of the 50 states

there are agreements where there's um I

forget the organization but the

organization partners with public school

system and there is this clause where

they can provide

like seemingly pornographic content but

if it's if it's deemed deemed usable as

an educational resource, then it

navigates through whatever lewd, you

know, act might be happening. But what's

crazy is that it partners with very

well-known pornographic websites and

magazines and and they have a a

financial relationship with them and

they're providing the material,

>> right?

So, so, so what what we're what we're

allowing to happen is the public school

system is educating our kids on sex, but

it's based on this fictitious

representation of sex that's not sex at

all. It's this, you know, mirage and

this manipulation and these broken

people doing something broken that has

nothing to do with what God intended sex

to be. And that's what we're deeming

education. And in a sense, even even the

safe sex, the protected sex, that's a

that's an underhanded way to say this is

okay. Like you can do it, you shouldn't

do it, but if you're going to do it,

then here's how you should do it to

protect yourself. Which makes it s now

it sounds like safe. It's safe now. Like

even in the sense of sin is not safe in

any way if you think about the spiritual

aspects. But now you're making it safe.

So, that seems like it's it's okay if I

do it the right way.

>> But it's like uh when you say um adult

content,

>> just just think about what you're

[laughter] think about what you're

saying.

>> True. It's true.

>> Like you're insinuating that this is

something that is for adults and it's

okay for adults to do. around what age

would you recommend and how important it

is it for parents to have those godly

conversations about how God why God made

sex the purpose of it all the good that

that God created it for

>> I think about this so not only is so the

average age of exposure pornography is

is drifting towards eight it was 11 um

just in 2020 and then in 2020 we see um

this hyperutilization

of technology technology and now because

of AI and and a lot of people that are

homeschooling

um which we do uh you utilize a lot of

technology and like you know different

you know but in that you're utilizing

more screen time and I say all that to

say 84%

of kids who are exposed to porn for the

first time 12 years old and under it was

incidental exposure meaning that they

were not looking for it

>> for our kids you know there's this you

know this age of understanding or age of

innocence, you know, essentially it's

like when when a kid um stops running

around naked like woo, you know,

[laughter] it's like, you know, once,

you know, they're they're they're in the

bathroom and they don't want to be seen

or they're changing whatever and they

they they start to acknowledge I'm naked

and and I want to cover up. I think

that's the beginning of this this

consciousness is being developed.

>> Um but there's a really great resource.

is called Good Pictures, Bad Pictures,

and it's a 20-year-old book, and it it

it's so brilliant, and I think it it's

it's good for even the the the theme of

it is good for adults. Ultimately it

says that hey uh your private parts

should be private and they're not for

anyone to see but because of sin

sometimes you will see private parts in

books magazines and on the internet and

sometimes TV

>> and if you see that in the same way that

if you're hurt what do you do come to

mom and dad if you're scared what do you

do come to mom and dad if you see

something like that if you see private

parts of someone shows you something. I

don't want to see that. This is not good

for me. And you come to mom and dad.

>> I think a holdup could be for people,

you know, well, is it too young? Is it

going to is it going to defile their

minds? [snorts] But I want to throw this

in there. The enemy, like we're talking

about, he's not playing around. And he's

targeting even children at a young age.

>> We should be more afraid of if we don't

talk about it than being afraid to talk

about it. I had the opportunity to to be

at uh St. Vincent College in Latroe,

Pennsylvania and uh adjacent to it is a

basilica and I spent some time with

Father Max there and I was uh I had the

opportunity to to speak on chassity and

there were you know there's 143 monks

who live on site at this monastery and

that's why they have the distinction of

being a basilica and and to hear monks

who've taken a vow for life of chastity

to still say even though they've never

seen seen pornography. They've never had

an intimate, you know, encounter with a

woman, but to still state there there's

something in them that has a desire to

see what's underneath or or to wonder

what could be and and to wrestle with

that. There there's something written on

the human heart that desires connection

in that way. Like our sexuality is part

of our design by God. And I think to

deny helping someone navigate that is

irresponsible and dangerous

>> because that the the prevalency of it is

to the extent where it's not if it's

when someone sees some kind of sexual

content like like maybe maybe you won't

see hardcore pornography until later in

life or maybe never. Praise God. Um, but

the probability of you seeing a a sex

scene on a movie,

>> right,

>> or reading something in a novel, um, to

to experience sex outside of you and

your wife in some context, whether it be

imagery or audio or, you know, whatever

it is, well, you're going to have to be

able to discern and navigate through

that experience. If you don't have any

context for it, well, the world is going

to be your teacher. If we're diving into

the harmful, hurtful,

uh sometimes lasting effects until Jesus

comes in. Yeah. Amen.

>> What are some of those those things that

people are going to endure with?

>> The Bible's clear that, you know, sexual

immorality is not like every other sin

because the Bible tells us that it's

it's not only is it sin, but it's sin

against our own body. And I I think you

know neuroscience tells us that man that

that damage to the prefrontal cortex and

those I mean just the fact that um there

there's there's some debate about this

and and and maybe it's not to the extent

or maybe we've you know we've

exaggerated a little bit but it is a

reality that if you take a CT scan of

someone's brain who has been watching

hardcore pornography for for over 10

years and you take someone who has been

experiencing hard drugs for over 10

years and you look at the CT scan of the

brain and you you see the dopamine hit

as it goes up to the syninnapse. There

are tracks that are visible on a CT scan

of a a dopamine hit so strong and so

prevalent that it's visible on a CT

scan. So I I say that to say that

there's real damage that's been done to

your brain. And you I mean just think

about like a field. If if there's a

field outside and you ride a

four-wheeler down it, you always go down

the same track. Well, if I was riding my

four-wheeler out there for the first

time and I never rode out there, what am

I going to do? Well, if I see that

track, I'm gonna go down it. And that's

kind of how our thoughts are. It's like,

it's so interesting if we look at, man,

if if you were to drive, you know, you

know, to to wherever you might go on a

regular basis. Like, if I'm if I'm

driving home from my office, I don't

have to put it in the GPS, you know, I

drive it all the time. So,

subconsciously, you know, I'm taking a

left, I'm taking a right, I'm go. So our

brain, our body, our brain, you know, it

it remembers, you know, it it it keeps

score and there's so many of our actions

that are subconscious because there's

there's just been learnings and it's so

easy to fall on those pathways. So with

that said, like those markers are there

and and and that's why I tell people

often the depth of your confession is

going to equate to the level of your

healing. And what I mean by that, it's

it's not just that you do it. No, let

let's let's put everything on the

threshing floor, you know. Um, so how do

you feel? Do I feel rejected? Do I feel

lonely? Do I'm tired? Am I hungry? Like

like what am I experiencing? because my

brain remembers when I feel this, I do

this to not feel this way or this

emotion is catalytic in my behavior and

my brain remembers this pattern that

I've ingrained within it. So, there are

these patterns that are ingrained and

they they attach an emotion to a

behavior. If I do that long enough, it's

like when I when I feel this, I'm going

to have a proclivity to do this and I'm

not really thinking about it. So in my

confession, it's like, man, I feel this

way and I take my phone and I go to my

room and and this is the website that I

go to and and even this is what I put in

the search bar. It's like when I'm

sitting with people one-on-one, I ask

them invasive questions like, "What kind

of porn do you watch?" Because I the

reason in that is like if if there's a

pattern, it points to a wound. It it

points to a lie that I have believed.

And if I believe a lie to be true, I

will live as if that lie is truth. And I

will seek out this thing to to to make

me, you know, to cover up what I don't

want to feel, to medicate the wound, to

get the affirmation, to not feel

rejected, whatever it is. But there's a

narrative that I've created in my mind

that's connected to an emotion. And it's

a real pattern. It's a real addiction.

So addictions like yes Jesus Christ and

the spirit

can do anything like God can do anything

but more often than not the practicality

of us walking in the freedom of

addiction it's like man I need clear

confession I need to replace bad habits

with with godly habits and I need to

navigate this story that I've been

telling myself because it's not just

that I do it because like the

pornography that I'm consuming is

catalytic in these other problems, but I

got to get to the root of why do I do

it? Like what did I see when I was a

kid? What like what what did I

experience as a kid or what rejection

did I experience? Like what was the

reason that I sought it out for the

first time? Because there's something

that's beyond the fact that I'm just

doing it that's driving me to do it. So

like that's why it's so important to sit

with people with that. So just regarding

the harm and then like yeah I mean

across the board you know it's it it

contributes to sex trafficking it

contributes to human trafficking. It

contributes to the harm of children like

we were sharing like um earlier like why

is it so important to have your your

kids talk about it? Well a a it's

unfortunately very prevalent right now

for young men to regarding Instagram or

Snapchat is where it normally happens

where there's a a fake profile. It looks

like a pretty girl. They reach out. They

say, "Hey, show me show me yours. I'll

show you mine. A picture is sent. Got

you. Um, I have a screenshot of all your

family members, all your information.

I've stripped your data. And if you

don't send me x amount of dollars in 48

hours, then I'm going to expose you to

everyone."

>> Wow.

>> And the amount of suicides that that's

attached to is astronomical. In 95% of

those cases, it's teenage boys.

>> Wow.

>> And and and this is happening at an

astronomical rate.

>> Really? Wow.

>> That's why it's so important that we

guard our minds.

>> What about the person who uh is married,

has kids, you know, maybe they're

attending church, you know, they think,

"Oh, the blood of Jesus, you know,

covers it. It's not a big deal." The

person who thinks that it's harmless.

I'm not hurting anyone. and my wife

[snorts] doesn't know about it.

>> You know, the person who thinks it's

harmless, what would you say to them?

>> I'd say you're falling, you know, right

into Satan's plan for your life. You

know, um because again, like if if if

infidelity, adultery, I is not defined

by what the world says, but by what the

word says. Well, Jesus says if you've

lusted after a woman in your own heart,

then you've committed adultery. And and

what he's saying is man like the problem

is not within your eyes or your ears or

your fingers or it's it's in your heart

like you're your heart is been

contaminated and only the blood of Jesus

can filter it. Um so to that person it's

like man you you are harming yourself

because what it's teaching you is that

well it's it's okay for me to do this. I

mean, and unfortunately, I navigate this

often where, you know, there's a clear

line in the sand where it's like, you

know, I'm I'm on fire for Jesus and, you

know, I'm I'm going to stay faithful to

my wife and this and that and then you

fall back into pornography and then

you've been doing that for a while and

then in in some way you you you justify

it. You know, your your wife just had a

child. you're not being intimate and and

because you've wrestled with pornography

before, again, I I I say this out of

someone who who who has been there. I I

have thought this way. Um and you know,

the word of God and the people of God

have corrected me and loved on me. Um

it's like

I am not owed sex. Like you you can lust

after your wife, which is, you know, a

wild like you can lust after your wife.

[laughter]

And and what I mean by that is is your

wife is not something for your use for

you to take from.

>> Like Ephesians 5, like people like,

well, you know, like my my wife's

supposed to serve me. Well, we'll read

all of it. You're called to die

>> as Christ has died for the church.

>> Um, so sometimes I'm called to die to my

flesh. The way that porn works, it's

kind of like a cup of coffee, man. I

used to be able to drink a half a cup of

coffee and felt incredible. Now, now I

need a double espresso, you know, um

because there's this adaptation in the

same way my mind that dopamine hit that

I used to see, you know, a picture of a

pretty girl, now I need to see like more

and darker and deeper and all this

stuff. And what begins to happen is um

because I'm believing what I'm seeing to

be reality, I'm beginning to develop a

taste bud for what I see. And if my wife

can't give me what I see because what

I'm desiring is fictitious in a way that

I'm I'm going to become insatiable for

what I'm consuming. And I want I want I

want to partake in what I see. And if I

can't, what's going to happen over time

is I'm going to look at deeper and

darker porn. And then all of a sudden,

uh, my my real interactions with people

where it's like, I'm going to probably

say something I shouldn't say or maybe

respond to a message I shouldn't respond

to or like something I shouldn't like,

then all of a sudden I'm going to accept

a lunch I shouldn't accept. And I mean,

unfortunately, like to my point earlier,

I've sat with so many people that, man,

it started with porn and then they had

an inappropriate conversation or an

inappropriate tax exchange and all of a

sudden there was a lunch that they

should have had they shouldn't have had.

Then all of a sudden they they end up in

a hotel room cheating on their wife

>> and they blow up their ministry, blow up

their marriage and and all of a sudden

it's like, man, how did I get here? It's

like, well, a little bit of yeast ruins

the whole batch.

>> Yeah.

>> Compromise doesn't stay where you put

it. getting almost into that because

there have been people who have been

influential in the body of Christ fall

when it comes to sexual immorality.

Proverbs chapter 7, it speaks of uh the

immoral woman and her her purposes. You

know, u don't let your heart turn aside

her way. Do not stray into her paths.

You know, says she's cast down many

wounded and all who were slain by her

were strong men. Her house is the way to

hell descending to the chambers of

death. What can men of God do to be

aware of the immoral woman? And what

what are some things that they can do?

Because people who are watching this

might already be a step or two into

moving towards adultery. They don't want

to do that, but they're already in this

process of being seduced.

>> What are some real practical things and

even fear of the Lord of of that and not

entering into that path? Yeah, I would

say read read all of, you know, Proverbs

56 and 7. You know, that the reality

that man, uh, who can have a, you know,

a bunch of coals on their lap and not

get burned, you know, let's let's not be

silly. Um, but I would say, man, to that

that person, the reality is you have to

do what you don't want to do most, which

is you you have to expose yourself.

>> I mean, it's like I I love walking

people through this reality. David, you

know, 2 Samuel chapter 11, David was not

at war. he was not where he was supposed

to be. And where you're not where you're

supposed to be, you'll see something you

were never intended to see.

>> And there's a duality of that. Like,

sure, there's this um this thought of uh

if if if I'm somewhere I shouldn't be,

you know, if I'm at a club or if I'm on

a porn site, I'm going to see something

I should have seen. But but but that's

not really what I'm trying to

communicate. If if you're not doing what

you're supposed to do, you'll see

something you weren't intended to see.

>> Yeah. Um Jay Stringer has a book um

called Unwanted. He's a a psychologist

in New York and um he talks about how if

if you can clearly articulate your

God-given purpose, you're 80% less

likely to fall in habitual sin.

>> Like there's something about knowing who

you are, who's you are, and and what you

are uniquely called to do. And like I'm

just going to align my yeses and nos

with that. That doesn't mean you're

going to be perfect. That doesn't mean

you're not going to sin. But that does

mean that you're going to live on

mission. and if I'm on mission, I'm

going to pay attention, you know, to

what I want to focus on. Um, so to that

person,

man, I keep reading through David, it's

like, man, uh, God gave him

opportunities, and it's like David

wasn't where he was supposed to be. He

saw something he should have seen. He

saw Bashibba bathing. And you know, I

I've I've stood in Jerusalem and and and

and been inside the structure that, you

know, were believed to be, you know,

David's home. And where his, you know,

his primary soldiers lived, like where

Uriah would have lived would not been

that far away.

>> So I I don't believe that David didn't

know who that was. So I think sometimes

we we we we send someone to go see about

something when we already know the

answer. Mh.

>> And when he sent to someone to see about

it, I think there was something so

practical in this. And this is really

what I want the audience to hear. David

sent someone to see about her.

She had a name. She was a wife. She was

a daughter. That that it wasn't a a

pretty girl. It wasn't pixels on a

screen. It wasn't, you know, a a you

know, whatever. It was an image bearer

of God. It was a a daughter. It was a

wife. She's an a woman crowned with

dignity and honor and glory.

>> Yeah.

>> And and I think what we see in that is

like in David's not like he didn't

stumble into sin in his strategic

pursuit to sin. And in the same way, you

know, we we don't trip and end up on a

porn website. In our strategic pursuit

to pursue sin, we have a good father

that loves us so much that says, "Hey,

I'm in the room.

I'm not far away. I'm in the room." And

maybe I'll see the swirly thing. I'll

see the the the swirly thing of death or

I'll get a text message from a godly

friend or I'll hear a a random sound

outside. That's not a coincidence.

That's a good father that loves you

that's saying, "Son, please don't."

Yeah.

>> It's a warning because we have a good

father.

>> Yeah.

>> And sometimes in spite of that, as David

did, uh we'll do it anyway. And when we

when we sin anyway, what do we do? In

the same way that David sent Uriah into

battle to die, we clear our browser

history because we believe that we can

cover up our sin and we don't want to be

found out. And either we experience what

David experienced in the next chapter.

>> Um we where Nathan comes to him. He's

like, "Hey, well, let me tell you a

story. There's a rich man and a poor man

and and he killed this poor man's uh we

little lamb." And David's like, "Who

could have done that? What a terrible

man." And he says, "You're that man."

And and David's acknowledgment of his

sin. I think that in itself, it points

to with so much clarity. Like David was

not a perfect man, but David had a go a,

you know, he was he was a man shaped

after God's own heart in that he had an

adoration for God. He had a a reverence

for God. And even when he got off track,

even when he made egregious sin, he he

never stopped desiring God's presence.

And you know, he even says, you know, he

didn't say, "Man, uh, I don't want to

lose my status. I don't want to lose my

throne. I don't want to lose my

influence. I want to lose my money." I

like please don't take your spirit

>> Yeah.

>> from me.

>> Yeah.

>> And then we see Psalm 51. So I I I say

all that to say um to the person that is

is currently

living in sin, but you haven't made an

egregious mistake. You know, you haven't

you haven't blown up your life. You

haven't, you know, had any kind of

physical encounter. Um but but porn is

something you keep going back to and

it's a struggle. You you have to tell

someone and I and and I I just really

believe this. You can only be as free as

you're willing to be honest.

It can't be, man, I'm going to confess

90% of it. Well, that 10% is what Satan

is using to keep you captive.

>> Yeah.

>> There there there is this oppression

that's keeping you stuck in this place.

And man, I I need to invite someone into

that and say, "Hey, man. Um, this is

what's going on in my life." Like, if if

you're a man, find a man. If you're a

woman, find a woman. And and that that

loves you and that loves Jesus

>> and say, "Hey, this is what's going on

with my life. And I'm struggling.

And I want accountability.

I want to walk on the light. And I want

to confess. And I want you to pray for

me and commit to praying with me." And I

think what's important from there, it's

like, man, if I need to take inventory,

it's like, man, uh because you can't be

obedient until you're self-aware. So,

part of me becoming self-aware is like,

man, uh what

am I allowing into my life? This may be

catalytic in me falling into temptation.

Like, is it somewhere I'm going? Is it

people who are speaking into my life? Um

is it music I'm listening to? Is it is

it something I'm watching? Is it someone

I'm following on social media? Like,

what temptation can I remove

>> so I'm not tempted?

>> Yeah.

>> Um, and then I need to invite real

accountability into my life. I need real

accountability. So, I need everyone

needs a local church to be plugged into.

I need to be, you know, tithing,

serving. You know, we're we're not

called to be consumers. We're called to

be contributors. So, are you plugged

into and contributing to a local body in

some capacity? That'll look different

for each person. Um, and do you have a a

group of people you do life with, a

small group or a group of people you do

life with? And you need one to three

people who are close to you and they

know not not just, you know, stuff here

and there. They they know it all. Like I

think you need one person that knows all

your sin,

>> your dreams, hopes, how how would you

fall, have you how how you felt in, you

know, in the past. know all of it so

they can be praying for you and and you

make a strategic plan of man when I feel

tempted or when I do something I ought

not do. I can't just like white knuckle

it and and try really hard not to do it.

Like the Bible doesn't say that. It says

to flee to temptation, you know? So I

have to flee temptation, but I have to

know what I'm running from and where I'm

running to. I can't just run because if

I'm not careful, I'll run from porn to

alcohol to gambling to, you know,

idolatry. Like, I'm I'm going to replace

one thing with another,

>> right?

>> So, I've got to run to God and I need to

I need to have people close enough to me

to to see me for who I am where I am and

and love on me and pray for me and walk

with me. Um because I I think that's

like the antidote for addiction

is connection.

>> And I think another important part of

this, you know, we've been talking about

people try to justify and they try to

make excuses of why it's okay. And just

to even take it a little step further,

you know, for me, when I was getting

free from pornography, I had come out of

sexual morality. I mean, it's a form of

sexual morality, sorry. But I had come

out of physically sleeping with with

women. Okay. And then I was still

watching pornography. But then there was

this other season where okay, I'm

convicted pornography is a sin. And then

I was in masturbation.

>> Yeah.

>> Uh and there are still people who are

married who are are still masturbating.

Yeah.

>> Um for me, the the Lord helped me to get

rid of that before I was even married.

Yeah.

>> But there was a season where I was even

trying to imagine I was a single guy at

the time. I was trying to imagine my

future wife.

>> Yeah. uh while still continuing to

masturbate. I stopped pornography. I

wasn't imagining a person's face. I was

just imagining maybe the body. I don't

know who it's going to be, but I'm just

doing this to who my future wife could

be. And that was how I was justifying

that that sin. So, I was really seeking

the Lord about it. Yeah.

>> God, is this a sin? If it is, you know,

help me to stop. I want to know that

it's a sin. And I went through this

journey of seeking him. I kind of wanted

to hear what I wanted to hear, you know,

and it's like, okay, you're not giving

me a really good biblical example or

scripture that's saying it's a sin, so

I'm going to keep doing it. Was in my

apartment and I was half asleep, half

not asleep.

>> And I heard a voice speak to me at the

same time that it was almost like a a

PowerPoint where that word affected

something scrolls across the screen.

Romans 6:21 scrolls across the screen

and I hear at the same time Romans 6:21

and it wakes me up. Romans 6:21. What is

that? So I pull it up. What fruit did

you have then in the things of which you

are now ashamed? For the end of those

things is death.

>> And the Lord was letting me know the end

of that is death.

>> Yeah.

>> Uh but the the amazing thing is God gave

me this verse to really bring the

conviction and really let me know this

is a sin. It's not okay. But if you look

at where it's sandwiched, it's amazing

because it says uh for when we were

slaves of sin, you were free in regards

to righteousness. What fruit did you

have then in the things of which you are

now ashamed? For the end of those things

is death. But now having been set free

from sin and having become slaves of

God, you have your fruit to holiness and

the end everlasting life. For the wages

of sin is death, but the gift of God is

eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

>> Amen. which revealed to me, not only

convicted me, but then it also gave me

hope. Now he is empowering me. And it's

not just me trying to do my best. It's

not me just like you said, white

knuckling this thing and uh and I'm not

going to do it. I'm not going to do it.

I'm not going to do it. And then you

[snorts] fall into it. Yeah.

>> But it's this shift of not having

self-confidence, not trusting in myself

to now I'm trusting in him.

>> Yeah.

>> What he's done inside of me. I'm born

again, new heart, transforming by the

renewing of my mind. I've got the mind

of Christ, all the identity part of

Christ, which you talked about earlier.

>> Now, he's inside of me, and he's

empowering me to overcome those

temptations. He's not going to allow me

to be tempted beyond what I can bear

with every temptation. He prepares a way

of escape. It's not self-righteousness.

A lot of people try to that's part of

their justification is, well, I'm just

human. I'm going to sin. You know, I

can't I'm not Jesus. I can't be perfect.

And they make excuses. But it's truly

his righteousness empowering us, being

produced into us to produce those those

good fruits. I'm so glad you said that

because there's so many people um not I

I don't want to say so many because it's

not like it's like a prevalent teaching,

but there are people who are in ministry

that I love and respect that I have

heard say um if if you are a itinerate

preacher and you're married um a a good

tool to guard yourself against sexual

immorality is masturbation. The enemy

wants you to justify

you succumbing to the temptations of

your flesh. It seems as if uh the the

fruit of the Holy Spirit, it it if it if

it begins with love and ends with

self-control,

um it it seems like that's important.

And it seems that if if sexual

immorality is sending as my own body and

I'm I'm supposed to abstain from

selfishness and I'm supposed to lay down

my life, you know, and I'm supposed to

not make, you know, any uh provision for

the flesh and it it's it it just seems

really clear to me. And then just

practically like masturbation uh I'm I'm

formulating chemically because when you

know when when I climax there's bonding

chemicals in my brain released where I'm

tying myself I'm tying myself to that

moment. So essentially I'm forming a

relationship with my hand. I'm

practicing finishing quickly. I'm I'm

being selfish. I'm I'm serving myself.

I'm seeking pleasure. I'm I'm not having

self-control. Um, so it seems like all

those things would be indicative of me

training myself to be selfish and bad at

having sex with my wife.

>> Yeah.

>> So it seems from a practical and a

textual standpoint,

if if if sin, you know, that the it's an

archery term, you know, the bullseye of

the bullseye of the bullseye, that seems

pretty off the bullseye to me.

>> Um, yeah. I mean, I I I think it's just

clear that you are inviting

destruction into your life

>> by doing that. And and I've had this

conversation with so many people. Um but

unfortunately, like that that is it's

this idea that man, I can I can I can

masturbate without lusting. It's like,

okay, if you're the anomaly that can

like stare at a wall and masturbate and

not think about, you know, any other

person, still you you are

walking in selfishness and you are like

providing yourself with self-pleasure in

a way that is sexual, right?

>> So, it it's really hard for me no matter

how you cut it,

>> right? Um cuz cuz I mean I've even heard

the argument of like gosh, you know, a

70-year-old man that his his wife dies

of cancer and he's thinking about her

and he masturbates. It's like, well,

okay, like I I I probably wouldn't

ridicule the man, but it's like, man, if

you if you press me on it, like, am I

going to say like, is this like edifying

like unto the Lord? The answer is no,

>> right? Um, and what he's longing for,

Christ can actually give him,

>> right? Amen.

>> So, I mean, that I mean, that's that's

the the the bottleneck of all sin. We

were created to long for our creator and

commune with him and and we try anything

but that to give us what only he can

give us. There was a gentleman I was

talking to recently. We met him on the

college tour. He was down at LSU. But

>> he gave us this this analogy and it goes

back into relationship with God. But he

gave me this this analogy of being aware

of God's presence.

>> Yeah.

>> And he was saying, I'm sitting here with

you guys. We were eating at I think at

IHOP. It was late at night. It was after

we got done with the college uh like

some of our events on a college campus,

like 1:00 a.m. And uh bad idea to eat

that that late, but anyway, I've been

there. We hadn't seen them in a while.

So, we're like, "Dude, yes, we'll come

out and eat with you."

So, we were eating there and he was

saying, "It would be really weird of me

if I just pulled out my phone right now,

looked up some pornographic video, and

just unzipped my pants and started

masturbating." Yeah.

>> Like, at this restaurant with these

people around, and in the presence of

you guys, my friends,

>> it would be really, really weird

>> to think of God being with us. I'll

never leave you nor forsake you. his

presence being there with us all the

time. So when someone does go to the

bathroom, they go to their bedroom, they

lock the door, and they flip open their

phone or their laptop or TV and they

start to do that, they wouldn't do that

in front of their wife, in front of

their friends, and God is there. Yeah.

Literally, if you're a believer, God is

there with you, and you're doing it

right in front of him. Yeah. Yeah.

>> And it brought this whole new kind of

awareness of, man, you're right. And

that could go with any sin. Would we do

that if we were a aware and we actually

valued his friendship and his presence?

>> He loves you so much that not only

>> does he not leave you or forsake you, he

loves you enough to to try to send a,

you know, a holy disruption into your

life. And I think that's the the problem

with the impact of the brain because we

we grow apathetic towards the things of

God because we develop this this

neurological indifference because I've

I've now become numb. It's like God's

God's never stopped speaking. He never

stopped seeking. He never stopped

showing up. But we've become numb to his

presence because we're so saturated in

our sin. So I I love uh Titus 2, you

know, it talks about how the the the the

byproduct of saying no to ungodliness is

I actually start developing a hunger for

righteousness. Like I can change the

taste buds of my heart, but how in tune

and how aware I am of of who God is and

where God is, often it's going to be

indicative of like am I reading the

word? Like am I praying? like am I um

you know trying to live a life that is

worthy of the calling that I've received

in Christ Jesus. Like am I fully aware

that God is in the room?

>> Yeah.

>> And if and if I'm not, then I'm going to

act like he's somewhere far off and and

when I sin, he he he leaves me and he

gets more distance from me. But that's

not true. Speaking of, you know, God

being our father and this relational

side of things, you know, if we start

back at the beginning of your story, you

know, your father wasn't in your life.

He wasn't a part of your life. Yeah.

>> And we've been talking about even

parenting and having these discussions

with our children and getting in there

before the enemy gets in there and does

has his way.

>> You know, how important is it uh for

Americans, for people worldwide?

>> Yeah. How important is it for that

father to be in his children's lives?

>> Yeah. I mean, you you look at um Josh

Howard has a really great chart

regarding I don't even know if it's his

or he he found it somewhere, but

>> there's just talking about how

fatherlessness is a great predictor of

pretty much every societal

harm that we would see, whether it be,

[clears throat]

>> you know, another generation of

fatherlessness or divorce or, you know,

crime or or poverty or whatever it might

be. our first son, Canon, our oldest,

when he was born, um I I was scared, you

know, and it's like my wife her her

water broke like the middle of a

CrossFit workout. She's doing like wall

balls and her water breaks. I'm like

freak freaking out.

>> I'm freaking out. And then we uh and you

know, we we we get to the hospital and

like her water's broke and she's just

dilated enough for her to be admitted

and then 24 hours later

Cannon's born and I'm like, "Ah." you

know, and um he's born and you know,

he's got like, you know, like all like

slimy like alien head like you know,

looks like you know,

>> and then uh the the nurse is like, "Hey,

uh you know, you come over and see him,

you know, you can touch him." And um I

was kind of like [laughter]

and uh but yeah, but I just like reached

my hand in his direction and he

man.

Um,

that little boy grabbed my finger and

I was like, man, I I love this little

boy with all my heart. Like, this is my

son. Um,

I'd do anything to protect you, die for

you. And in that moment, God whispered

to me in my spirit, it's like, I love

you so much more than that.

And it's the father's love that taught

me how to be a son, which allows me to

be a dad.

>> Amen. And um just been moments like that

where

um

just God loving on me, healed healed

places in me that allowed me to be a

friend, a husband, father. One of the

most important things, man, in in my

life in in my secret time with the Lord,

just me by secret time for those of who

don't know or secret place, it's just me

having father-son time.

>> Yeah. is uh the Lord almost always

starts out with I love you. Yeah.

>> Or I love you son.

>> Yeah.

>> And there have been moments where, you

know, I'll praise and worship. Usually

I'll praise and worship God. I just get

my guitar out and sing to him and then

I'll go into a time of listening to his

voice and I'll journal what I feel like

the Lord's speaking to me.

>> And uh and there have been so many times

where I come in almost in this task

driven busyness. I've got so much going

on in my life. similar to, you know,

Martha was busy in trouble about many

things. But I'll come in, I'll sit at

his feet like Mary did, but I'm just

thinking kind of moving on to the next

thing.

>> Or I'm thinking, let's get to the point

that what you need to tell me, what I

need to learn, and then, you know, I'll

move past this and go on. And it's like

the Lord will pause me and just say, I

love you, son.

>> And then I'm like, okay. Yeah. And I'm

just waiting for, okay, what are you

gonna say now? you know, and he's like,

"I love you." And I'm like, "Oh, wow."

You know, and then it when he first

started doing it, it took me a while to

catch on, but I'm like, "Wow." You know,

and then the Lord told me, "This is the

most important part of our time

together." Yeah.

>> You're you're thinking that it's

something you need to learn, something

this and that, an assignment I have for

you, responsibility I have for you. But

he's saying, "This is this is the most

important time uh part of our time

together." Yeah. Yeah.

>> And he's just speaking over me,

>> I love you.

>> The love of God will satiate you and

satisfy you in a way that nothing else

can. And

when your heart receives the thing that

is ultimately longing for, it will

compel you to live in the way that both

honors God and is in your best interest.

It's like I I' I've heard it said it's

like man what whatever is in you when

life bumps you, it'll spill out of you.

And what you're saying is like, yeah,

man, if if I am soaking in the fact

that, you know, I love my friend Ben

[snorts] uh Ben Fuller. He has this song

talks about how um I'm the I'm a son of

the most high God and the most high God

is for me. You see Genesis 2 to Genesis

3. Genesis 2, Adam and Eve, they're

walking. They were naked and unafraid.

There was no sin. There was no striving.

There's this beautiful picture of

shalom, uh, completeness, peace,

totality. They were not striving. They

were not wishing they were somewhere

else. They were not wishing they had

something else. And then Genesis 3, sin

enters the picture and and God does a

few things that I find so interesting.

They were hiding and they were covering

up. But he says, "Where are you?" He's a

good father. He's God. You know, he he's

not confused about their geographical

location. It's a rhetorical statement.

You see, why are you hiding from me?

I I I know what you did. I know why

you're hiding.

I know where you're hiding. So, I'm

asking you, why are you hiding from me?

And then secondly, who told you you were

naked? What what lie of you believe that

you were hiding from God when he's the

only one that can heal you and transform

you? So the only rationable the only

rational response to the gospel is for

me to come out of hiding and come to my

father because he alone can heal me.

Amen. What would you say to someone

who's watching today that maybe feels

like that they've been entangled in some

of the stuff we've been talking about?

They feel like maybe they've sinned too

much or are too far gone or some of the

stuff you were you were dealing with.

You know, why would God uh want to be

with me? want to know me, what am I

worth? What would you say to the person

on that? And and how can they come to

him?

>> Yeah. I mean, I would say to the person

listening that man, if if you feel like

you have gone too far, you've done too

much. That's shame. And shame will keep

you stuck in a place that you can't get

out of. And it's a place that you don't

want to be, but it's a seem. It's

seemingly your identity. And that's why

shame is so powerful. It's telling this

this narrative, this self um narrative

that this is who I am. So, this is where

I have to stay. And that's the struggle

for so many people. And if you're in

that place, well, number one, uh God has

not left you. He hasn't forgot about you

and you haven't done too much. You see,

the the power of the cross is it undo

what we cannot undo. It's like you look

at what Jesus said on the cross to

Talsty. What does that mean? Well, it's

it's a monetary term. It means that

there was a debt that was paid and it

was paid in full. It's a judiciary term,

meaning that there was a sentence that

had to be served, but he served it in

your place. Then thirdly, it's a battle

cry. It's saying that there was a battle

and it was won on your behalf. And Jesus

is saying it is finished. So to you, no

matter where you are, no matter where

you've been. Uh Romans 3:23 says that

we've all sinned and fall short of the

glory of God. So it's not what you did,

it's who you sinned against. You sinned

against a holy and perfect God. And

Romans 6:23 says, "The wages of that sin

is death." So we are separated from God.

And if we were to die today, not

reconciled to God, we would spend

forever away from him. But God in his

mercy, he sends Jesus to be born of a

virgin to live a perfect life. He never

sinned. And he who knew no sin became

sin so that we might become the

righteousness of God. So what that means

is that Jesus Christ,

fully God, fully man, he goes to the

cross and he dies in our place.

And he didn't stay dead. On the third

day, he rose defeating hell, death, sin,

and the grave. And he's ascended to the

right hand of God where he rules and

reigns. And because that is not just uh

an amazing, you know, thought, it's

actual truth,

that means somehow some way that that

that matters for me and you. And Romans

10:9 says that if you truly if you feel

drawn in your heart by the spirit of God

and you confess with your mouth that

Jesus Christ is Lord and you believe

that he was raised from the dead, you

will be saved. His blood was spilt to

cover your every sin.

You can't save yourself, but Jesus can.

And so my advice to you, no matter where

you are, no matter where you've been,

confess your sin and turn from it. You

can't save yourself. You can't fix

yourself, but turn to him.

Surrender your life to him. Make him not

only your savior, but your Lord

and and pray that he moves into your

life. And if you seek him, you'll find

him. If you call out to him, he'll save

you.

>> Amen. Amen. And then for anyone who's

watching right now, if you have no idea

how to do that, how do you call out to

God? Well, he he said it even in Romans

10:9 and 10. It's about confessing with

your mouth and believing in your heart

at the same time. Philip, an evangelist,

was with a unic in the scriptures. And

the unic was asking, "What hinders me

from being baptized?" And Philip said to

him, "If you believe with all your

heart, you may." And he said, "I believe

Jesus Christ is the son of God." He

confessed it with his mouth and he was

believing it with all of his heart. So

for those of you who don't know how to

do that, I can walk you through a simple

prayer of you confessing that out,

believing in your heart and we can talk

to God right here and right now. So if

that's you, then just repeat this after

me. You can form your own prayer if you

want to, but this is uh to help those

who want help with that. So just say

this. Say, "God, forgive me for all of

my sins. I turn away from sin today and

I turn to you. I believe that Jesus

Christ is my Lord. That he died for my

sins and that you raised him from the

dead. I ask you to fill me with the Holy

Spirit. I give my whole life to you in

Jesus name. Amen.

>> Amen.

>> Amen. Now, if you've said that, the

Bible says all of your sins are

forgiven. God has chosen to forget them.

When he looks at you, he now sees

Jesus's perfect life upon you. It's as

if you never sinned and as if you did

everything right. God has welcomed you

in with open arms and he's going to have

you on a journey of continuing to follow

him throughout the rest of your life.

And Joshua, even a big part of what I

feel like God is revealing today through

this is not only the importance of first

loving him. Yeah. Yeah.

>> And being with him and knowing of his

love and that communion with him, but

then the aspect of loving others.

>> Yeah.

>> And them loving you and the church, the

body of Christ, and the need for

disciplehip and praying for one another

and encouraging one another and bearing

one another's burdens, rejoicing with

one another, weeping with one another,

the accountability, the openness, the

confession, everything that the Bible

describes. It's so important. And it

truly is like a big family. Yeah. And we

need the this family of God. We need

first that relationship with him and

then we need our brothers and sisters to

then encourage us in and remind us of

our relationship with him. And it's this

huge family of God. Uh just love. I want

to say like a love fest. Uh but uh but

it's amazing. And when we do things,

>> you know, Jesus's way, he is the way. He

is even the way out. you talked about

earlier suicidal thoughts. Uh just to

tell a quick story. Um I was downtown uh

here in our city. We had taken our kids

out to ride their scooter and their

bike. We're having fun and this girl

walks up to me. She doesn't look like

she's had a rough life. She looks

well-dressed. She looks wellkept. She

comes up to me and says, "Are you that

guy from TikTok?" I said, "Yeah." Um and

she said, "Can you like pray for me or

something?" She said, "I I'm really

struggling with my faith right now." And

I I could tell she was being genuine,

just following the lead of the Holy

Spirit. My wife is right there with me.

We start to kind of ask her, you know,

what's going on with you at this point.

Throughout the prayer, I felt like God

gave me a word of knowledge that she was

dealing with suicide and there were

unclean spirits, like spirit of suicide

and things that were trying to get her

to take her life. She didn't share any

of that with me. And then afterward, she

kind of opened her eyes. I kind of

prayed a lengthy prayer and that was

part of it. She opened her eyes and

said, "Wow, how did you know that?" And

I didn't really know what part she was

talking about. Yeah.

>> But she said uh last night I was about

to take my own life. She actually went

to a church. She was a part of a youth

group. Uh some things had happened in

her life and she it was in a low point.

Some people believe some lies about her.

She was about to take her life and she

prayed the prayer. God, I pray if you're

real and you care about me, I pray that

you'll send someone uh that you'll

reveal yourself through or that will

reveal you to me. But part of what the

Lord had me pray over her and encourage

her with was that you're looking for a

way out of your circumstances, of your

situation, of the pain, of the the the

things that you're going through. You're

looking for a way out. And the only true

way out is Jesus. Yeah.

>> He's the way. And he's the way out of

this. man, it ministered to me as well

because when we get in the midst of

suffering, in tribulations, in trials,

the enemy will try to make that way out,

>> taking your your own life, trying to

escape that way. And I know it's a

sensitive subject. I've had people in my

life who have who have done that as

well. The true way out, what God was

revealing to this little girl, we

actually had a guy that we ministered to

in November. It was in Tucson, Arizona.

We ministered to him and I really felt

an urgency of the Holy Spirit uh to to

kind of press this guy. A lot of times

uh you know we don't want to force

things on people. People have free will

and they need to make a choice on their

own. Yeah.

>> But I felt this urgency

>> for this guy

>> to really kind of press him a little bit

on just give your life to God, man. Just

repent. Put your faith in Jesus.

Surrender to him. And he was saying some

things, but I I didn't really seem all

that concerning. He was saying some

things like, "Man, you know, I feel like

I'm stuck sometimes, this and that." He

was standing there with his fiance. This

is a young guy, mid-30s, probably with

his fiance. They're about to get

married, young.

>> And uh he said some things. I could tell

the guy was struggling. I had no it no

idea to the extent that he was. And we

posted that video. It was me just

standing on the street side on the

sidewalk talking to him. And we posted

that video and we started getting some

comments in the comments section. uh rip

rip this and that. It was only like a

month or two after we had had this

conversation with the guy

>> and he had he had taken his own life and

his sister and his family, some of them,

someone had emailed us and said, "Thank

you for having this conversation with

him." You know, it brought us some

comfort to know that he had this

conversation with you this and that. We

never really know how how close people

may be to that. Yeah. Um, but what what

we do know, and for those who are

watching today, if you are going through

that, if you've had those temptations,

if the enemy is trying to wave that in

front of your face or put those thoughts

in your head, know this. Jesus is the

only way out. He is the way. He is the

way out of your circumstances, the pain,

the suffering, the the the questioning,

what you're feeling on the inside. One,

he can relate to you. He humbled himself

as a man, came down and was at the point

sweating blood because of the the the

anguish and the the the the pressure

that was coming upon him in this world.

So he can relate to you. He can be

compassionate in your weaknesses because

he's experienced weakness and he was

tempted in every way with suicide

himself. Jesus was tempted with suicide.

The devil told him, "Why don't you jump

off this this temple?" And the Bible

says that the angels are going to be

bury you up lest you dash your foot

against the stone. That was a temptation

to get him to kill himself. So Jesus has

been in that temptation as well. And I'm

telling you, he's way more powerful than

the enemy. God loves you. He cares about

you. And Jesus is the true way out out

of all that you're experiencing. He can

bring healing. He can bring peace. He

can restore joy and hope and and sustain

you, fulfill you, and then keep you

together with him for all of eternity,

helping you through this life. You're

not too far gone. You haven't been

through too much. Uh relationships are

not too broken that God can't come in

and fix not only the relationship, but

really fix and heal you. He loves you.

He's calling you to him. And we just

shared with you how you can come to know

him. So Joshua, man, I've been super

encouraged uh throughout this uh been

kind of gleaning and sponging some of

the things that the Lord has taught you

and I know other people as well. This is

going to be really faithb buildinging

and things like that. How can people

stay connected with what God is doing

through your life and the ministry that

he's given to you?

>> Yeah. So I I uh social media is I am

Joshua Broom on all the channels and

then I have a podcast called Walkorthy.

So we post an episode every Monday and

yeah. So