01 دورة فن تربية الأولاد (أهمية التربية) د.أيمن عبدالسلام.

Allah Almighty said:

"They will give to whomsoever they will a wife and will give to whomsoever they will a husband" And thanks to this blessing is the upbringing of these children and their care and knowing the reasons for their righteousness Surely each one of us, whether his children or his neighbor's children or a teacher in the kindergarten or in school

He has a space under his hands from children If we use these spaces better There will be a noticeable change and a real change in society And each of us is trying to raise his children well But there are no solid foundations and pillars Each one of us wants his children to be good and the best children And he hopes that when he grows up, he will be righteous and not evil

But in fact, he didn't take them for the sake of their righteousness and for the sake of their good and correct upbringing. What are the reasons for the righteousness of children? Everyone asks himself a question: What are the reasons that I take them for? To fulfill my responsibility before our Lord, what are the reasons that I take them for? So that my children will be well raised, my children will have a good offspring, and in short, as Allah described, a pure family.

وَالَّذِينَ يَقُولُونَ رَبَّنَا هَبْلَنَا مِنْ أَزْوَاجِنَا وَذُرِّيَتِنَيْهِ قُرَّةَ أَعْيُنَ وَجَعَلْنَا لِلْمُتَّقِينَ إِمَامًا أول سبب من الأسباب دي الدعاء تعلق القلب بالله تبارك وتعالى إن الإنسان يكون عقيد سليم في أنه لا هداية إلا بيد الله سبحانه وتعالى النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم لم يملك الهداية لأقرب الناس إليه وهو عمه أبو طالب والنبي صلى الله عليه وسلم أعظم الناس تربيه

So the first weapon and the first reason for these reasons is the Du'aa. That's why our Lord, may Allah be pleased with him, told us in the Qur'an, "The supplications of the righteous to their children." Allah, the Exalted, said: "And those who say, 'Our Lord, give us from our wives and our children the right to have eyes and make us imams for the righteous.' " And Allah, the Exalted, said on the tongue of Zakaria, peace be upon him, "So give me from you

وَلِيَّ يَرِثُنِي وَيَرِثُ مِنْ آلِيَ عَقُوبٍ وَقَالَ اللَّهُ تَبَارَكَ وَتَعَالَ وَأَصْلِحْ لِي فِي ذُرِّيَّتِهِ وَقَالَ اللَّهُ تَبَارَكَ وَتَعَالَ هُنَالِكَ دَعَى زَكَرِيَّ رَبَّهُ قَالَ رَبِّ هَبِلِي مِنْ لَدُنْكَ ذُرِّيَّةً طَيِّبَةً إِنَّكَ سَمِيعُ الدُّعَاءِ فَأَوْل سَبَب تَعَلُّقِ الْقَلْبِ بِاللَّهِ تَبَارَكَ وَتَعَالَ مَنَ أَغْفَلْشِ عَنْ السَّبَبِ دَهِ لَأَنِ دَا أَعْظَمْ سَبَبِ الْهِدَايَ بِيَدِ اللَّهِ تَبَارَكَ وَتَعَالَ سَبَبِ التَّانِي صَلَاحِ الْآبَاءِ الْأَعْمَالِ الصَّالِحَةِ وَتَقْوَى الْوَالِدِ وَالْوَالِدَةِ

Allah told us about the two young men in the story of the green man. Allah said: "And their father was righteous, so your Lord wanted to reach them and extract their treasure." Our Lord has restricted them to come and demolish the wall, which is a sign of fall, and build a new wall to preserve the treasure under the wall because of the good of the father. "And their father was righteous."

وَقَالَ اللَّهُ تَبَارَكَ وَتَعَالَى وَلْيَخْشَ الَّذِينَ لَوْ تَرَكُوا مِنْ خَلْفِهِمْ ذُرِّيَّةً ضِعَافًا خَافُوا عَلَيْهِمْ يَعْمِلُوا ايْهِ فَلْيَتَّقُوا اللَّهَ وَلْيَقُولُوا قَوْلًا سَدِيدًا وَقَالَ اللَّهُ تَبَارَكَ وَتَعَالَى عَنْ زَكَرِيَّ عَلَيْهِ السَّلَامِ فَاسْتَجَبْنَا لَهُ وَوَهَبْنَا لَهُ يَحْيَا وَأَصْلَحْنَا لَهُ زَوْجَهُ زوجه زوجته دي كانت عاقر مش عقيم ايه الفرق بين العاقر والعقيم؟

The word "Aqir" means that there is a natural cause that prevents from the opposite But the word "Aqr" means that Allah Almighty did not only judge it is perfect but Allah Almighty did not punish the children with it And yet Allah Almighty described it as "Aqir" So Allah Almighty reformed it with what?

So we answered him and gave him Yahya and reformed his wife for him. Indeed, they were hastening in good deeds and they called us with desire and desire and were submissive to us. That's why the ancestors, may Allah be pleased with them, understood this meaning well. Sa'id ibn al-Musayyib, may Allah be pleased with him, used to say, I pray, I remember my son, so I add to my prayer. He prays like this, he thinks that one of the reasons for the children's prayer is

Salah al-abaa wa taqwaahum wa al-a'mal as-salihah. Fayzawad fi as-salah. Biniyatina Rabbana subhanahu wa ta'ala. Yuslih lahu waladahu. Yaqul inni la usalli fa adhkur waladi fa azidu fi salat. Ya'na min ajli an yuslihahu Allahu tabarak wa ta'ala. Sabab al-talit. Husnu al-ikhtiyar bayna al-zawjayn. Husnu al-ikhtiyar bayna al-zawjayn. Al-shara'a hassa al-ikhtiyar zat al-deen. Wa ala anna al-mar'a taqtara al-rajlu as-salih. Iza ja'akum man tardawn deenahu wa khulukahu. Fazawiju.

Why? Because changing the nature of the children will be in the first place because of who?

The father, the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, says: "No child is born except that which is born on him on the natural nature. So his parents will pamper him, or help him, or bless him." His father and mother are the ones who adjust and shape in this natural nature. So his parents will pamper him, or help him, or bless him. The fourth reason is the good role model of the father. There is no

without a practical model from the parents because no matter what the parents say, there is no result and no effect at all that's why Amri Ibn Utbah says to his son's teacher he tells him to be the first to correct your daughter, correct yourself

The first step of the reform of children is the reform of the teacher, the father and the mother. "So that your first reform is for your daughter, and your reform is for yourself. For their eyes are bound by your eyes. So good is with them what you have made, and bad is with them what you have left." If you keep telling them this is good and this is wrong, and then they see you doing the wrong and leaving the right, what is the most influential in them?

The example of the work model applied in front of them Therefore, they say that the action of a man in a thousand men is more important than the word of a thousand men to a man There must be a model model model in front of the children The fifth reason for the right of the offspring is the perfection of education The fifth reason is the perfection of education, and this is the subject of his turn We were looking at the reasons in general, among these reasons is the perfection of education

The course will be divided into two parts, the first part is the basics, in which we will talk about the importance of education, the methods of education, the fields, the rights of the child, and other issues that are essential for every father, mother, and teacher

and then there is the advanced course which will be for those who have completed this course we will talk about it in the field of education they call it behavior modification which is the problems of children and how we deal with these problems we will take each problem one by one and how we deal with it in detail what is the importance of education? we say that one of the reasons for the children to be honest is the perfection of education we did not say education

The education is very important. Why? What is the first education? Before we talk about the importance of education, what is the first education? The scholars say that education is the process of building human beings. The children we have are the ones who will build the society after that. So today's children are the youth of tomorrow. They are the youth of tomorrow. They are the adults of tomorrow.

If we hadn't reformed them from the beginning, they would have been the biggest youth. We would have been saying, "Look at what these youths are doing!" We neglected them when we were young. It is a process of building human beings with a pre-Islamic doctrine. The doctrine must be correct. Because the main driver of any person is belief. He moves according to his belief. If his belief is correct,

It will be easy to influence him as soon as you tell him, and he is a big young man, as soon as you tell him, Allah said and the Messenger said, he has a pure, pure, true doctrine. He will not argue with you, nor will he tell you to convince me, or the daughter will tell you to convince me with the Hijab, etc. etc. etc. The doctrine itself, when it is correct and fixed with the children, this is what the ancestors were concerned about. If we look at it in the middle of Luqman, and this will come with us, God willing, but if we look at it like this,

Quickly, in the middle of Luqman's speech to his son, when he is giving him, "O my son, first of all,

First of all, don't be a polytheist because polytheism is a great injustice. And he is teaching them to observe Allah's guidance. You are not going to sit with your children all the time. You will leave them and they will grow up. And then they can go to schools, go to universities, and get close to each other. And then they go to a school that is not a school. The boy goes to a school that is not a school. So he is teaching them to observe. So he says, "O sons, if you are a piece of a piece of clay, and you are in a rock, or in the heavens, or on earth, Allah will bring it to you." And he is teaching him. This is the main driver that will move the boy and the girl after that.

The observation of Allah, the Exalted, and the Exalted. That's why we say it's a process of building a human being with a pre-prophetic creed and pure concepts. We need to correct the misconceptions that are wrong with children. Society doesn't leave any concept except when it's polluted. The truth became false and the false became true. The known became denied and the denied became known. The sin became obedience and the innovation became...

The concept of "Tarbiya" was mentioned in the Quran in two places

Who knows these topics? Yes? Okay, may God bless you. Allah said: "And the Lord has revealed to them the wing of the beast of mercy, and be merciful to them as they were little children." And the second topic? This is the first topic, "and the Lord has revealed to them the wing of the beast of mercy." The second topic? Yes? No, I mean the word "education" or "cultivation" No, the word "education" or "cultivation" is mentioned in the story of Moses and Pharaoh. Pharaoh was telling Moses:

قَالَ أَلَمْنُ رَبِّكَ فِينَا وَلِيْدًا تفضل اسكتاة ده بيقول لك أنت كتاب اللعبة بقى خد شرف الموت قَالَ أَلَمْنُ رَبِّكَ فِينَا وَلِيْدًا وَلَبِثْتَ فِينَا مِنْ عُمُرِكَ سِنِينَ فَذُنُ الْمَوْضِعِينَ الْوَرَّضُ فِيهُمْ لَفْظُ التَّرْبِيَةِ فِيهِمْ فِي الْقُرْآنِ

The Arabs used the word "taqdeeb" instead of "tarbiyah" That's why they used to call the teacher "al-mu'addib" Imam Ibn Abi al-Dunya used to call him "mu'addib awlad al-khalafaa" But of course, many of the late people used to call this process "tarbiyah" And this is the most accurate word that was mentioned in the Qur'an

The first importance of raising children is that it is a responsibility that the father and mother are asked about on the Day of Judgment. The responsibility that the servant is asked about on the Day of Judgment. The Prophet ﷺ said: "All of you are a guardian and all of you are responsible for his guardian." So the man is a guardian in his family and is responsible for his guardian. And the wife is a guardian in her husband's money and is responsible for his guardian.

The father is responsible and the mother is responsible. The Prophet said: "Allah is always asking for what He has asked for. He has kept that which He has lost, so that the man may ask about the family of his house." So each of the parents, the father and the mother, will be asked about this and that. Some parents imagine that this education process is for whom?

and that his role is only to act like the police officer who is the one who gives the orders when the kids are arguing with each other he comes to solve the problem and see who is wrong and just do what he wants his role is only to interfere in the time of problems no he has a fundamental role that he cannot abandon and cannot be a photographer that his role is

that he is only saving them money, just ATM, that's it. His whole role is to save them money. No. Imam Ibn Al-Qayyim, may Allah have mercy on him, warns us of a very important point, which is that Allah, Exalted be He, asks the father about his son on the Day of Resurrection before he asks the son about his father. This is our Lord, Exalted be He, on the Day of Resurrection. Who will he ask first? Who will he ask the father and the mother about?

عن الولد الأول قبل ما يسأل الولد بقى انت برّت أبوك وأمك وأنّ عقّيتهم هايسأل مين الأول الأب والأم عن الولد فيقول إن الله سبحانه يسأل الوالد عن ولده يوم القيامة قبل أن يسأل الولد عن ولده فمن أهمل تعليم ولده ما ينفعه وتركه سُدًا فقد أساء إليه غاية الإساءة وأكثر الأولاد إنما جاء فسادهم من قبل الآباء وإهمالهم لهم

أَكْتَرُ الْأَبْنَاءِ فَسَدْهُمْ جَيْمْ مِنْ إِهْمَالِ الْأَبَاءِ وَالْأُمْهَاتِ وَتَرْكِ تَعْلِيمِهِمْ فَرَائِضَ الدِّينِ وَسُنَنِ فَأَضَاعُوهُمْ صِغَارًا فَلَمْ يَنْتَفِعُ بِأَنفُسِهِمْ وَلَمْ يَنْفَعُوا آبَأَهُمْ كِبَارًا كَمَا عَاتَبَا بَعْضُهُمْ وَلَدَهُ عَلَى الْعُقُوقِ يقول له يا ابني ليه بتعقني فقال له يا أبت إنك عققتني صغيرًا فعققتك كبيرًا جزاء من جنس العمل وَأَضَعْتَنِي وَلِيدًا فَأَضَعْتُكَ شَيْخًا

So, people don't want to think that the process of education is a kind of perfection or a cultural aspect. We are here to take cultural information and increase it. No, this is a fundamental responsibility that man is asked about on the Day of Judgment. So, the process of education is not a kind of perfection or a cultural aspect. So, we say that one of the reasons for the children's righteousness

Number 5: The perfect upbringing, not just the upbringing, the parents must perfect the upbringing The Prophet said: "Allah loves when someone does a good deed to perfect it" The companions who came to the mosque, and the companions were worried about beating him, the Prophet said to them: "Let them beat him, then pour a cup of water on his face"

The companions themselves, after leaving the masjid, say, By Allah, I have never seen a teacher before or after him who has the best teaching. This describes the perfection of the Prophet, peace be upon him, for education. They say, By Allah, I have never seen a teacher before or after him who has the best teaching. The Prophet, peace be upon him, reached the goal of perfecting education. Rather, in the modification of behavior, peace be upon him.

That's why the young man who came to the Prophet ﷺ and said to him, O Messenger of Allah, what is left for me in the adultery? The Prophet ﷺ said to him, do you accept him for your mother? Do you accept him? And so on and so forth. Until finally, this young man came out and described himself and said that he loved something in his heart, this sin. So he came out of the Prophet's ﷺ and the most heavy thing in his heart was the adjustment of behavior. He had a certain distortion. So the Prophet ﷺ raised him until this distortion was completely removed from his heart and became the most heavy thing.

This is what he wants. So the children are the will of Allah. Allah says: Allah will give you the will of Allah in your children. This is the will of Allah. And we said that Allah's will of Allah is in the parents of their children. It is preceded by the will of the children of their parents. And the more a person is perfect in this educational process, and better in his children, he is more than

His upbringing for his children is a charity. The Prophet said: "If a person dies, or if the son of Adam dies, his work will be cut off from him except from three." What are they? A charity or a knowledge that he benefits from, or a righteous boy who calls upon him. The goodness of upbringing is in which one of these three? A charity or a knowledge that he benefits from, or a righteous boy who calls upon him. Which one of the three? The three. Yes, the three. It is in the three.

How do you enter into the three? Sadaqah is running When you teach your children to pray and the Quran Whenever he prays and reads the Quran, Sadaqah is running for you You taught him Fatiha Whenever he prays and reads the Fatiha, Sadaqah is running for you And when he teaches someone Fatiha, all he learned after that is

This is in the balance of who taught him first. That's why the Prophet said: "Whoever calls to guidance, he will have a reward like the reward of those who follow him, and that will not be less than their reward." And it is a knowledge that is used. When your son learns, he will have a moral character. Whatever he creates with this moral character and deals with, this is a knowledge that is used in society. Okay? And likewise, a good son calls to him.

فالعملية التربوية أو تربية الأبناء مش مجرد وسيلة لتأمين الأولاد

Life after old age I raise them well so that when they grow up they do good So that when they grow up in age they don't want to be in an orphanage No, this is not what I mean at all This is a business project with God Almighty You are trading with our Lord Almighty If each of us feels that he is raising his children That this is a knowledge that is used for charity A righteous child will be called to him after that Even if these things did not happen

Even if they were wrong after their elders, you took them for reasons and followed the right principles But Allah did not value them for guidance, you took your reward from our Lord, they were not in need of it, the hearts are in the hands of Allah The Prophet told us that the Prophet will come on the Day of Resurrection with a man and the Prophet with two men and the Prophet with none

Imagine the prophet as one of the prophets, and the prophets are the best creation at all, they are the best people for education and training, and for caring about their interests, and for the best of the best. However, you will find that the prophet will come on the Day of Resurrection, and no one will answer him. This is the prophet. Did he receive the reward of the call and the prophecy or not? He received the reward of the call and the prophecy because he is not filled with the results. Who are these results? The Lord Almighty. But this is not the original.

For example, our master Noah, peace be upon him, no doubt that he is a prophet, a messenger from the messengers, and he is the first messenger of the people of the earth, Noah, peace be upon him. And yet his son was a disbeliever, but he was free and he did not leave a way to invite his son even at the end of the moments. Oh, my father, let him ride with us. The last thing, and the moog and the car is present and the punishment is down, and he says, oh, my father, let him ride with us and do not be with the disbelievers.

He said, "I will go to a mountain to get water from it." So, he did all that he had to do. And yet, our Lord, may Allah be pleased with him and grant us these examples, like the son of Noah, the uncle of the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, and others, so that the human heart does not become a thing related to materialistic causes, worldly causes. Whose heart is it related to? Our Lord, may Allah be pleased with him and grant us. So, the first reason we said was his reason.

Dua'a. Dua'a. Al-ta'alluq bi Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. Ya du'a Allah tabarak wa ta'ala an yuslih alahu ayy. Wala daba. Asham kida hana akhud min mu'awakati al-tarbiya inshaAllah hana akhud hafil muhadara gaya bi iznillah. Al-du'a'a ala al-abna'i. Da bi daya ala al-insan bi amir. Tamam? Walaakin lazim ni baa wakhdeen

We have to be aware that this is not the model of monotheism. No. This is a model of... How many times has it happened in history that the son of a prophet of the prophets disbelieves? Who do we know? He is our master Noah. Okay? So this is not the origin.

This is a situation that Allah tells us so that our hearts are connected to Allah. But is the punishment of goodness? If you are good, Allah will give you good.

So we say that education is not a means for a person to secure his life after he grows up, for example, no, this is a project to earn a salary and trade with God Almighty. That's why a person, even spending on his children, he is paying for this spending. The Prophet ﷺ says, دِينارٌ أَنفَقْتَهُ فِي سَبِيلِ اللَّهِ وَدِينارٌ أَنفَقْتَهُ فِي رَاقَبَهِ

"And the money you have given to the poor, and the money you have spent on your family, is the greatest reward you have ever spent on your family." This is the greatest reward. That's why, the more a person is able to raise his children, the more these children are able to look at their fathers. One of the prayers of the righteous is that they used to say, "Our Lord, grant us from our wives and our children

To be a role model for your children, you must be a role model for them and not leave them to society and then say that you will be a role model for them after that No, you must have a role and you must be walking on the right steps and the right principles So, perfecting upbringing is a reason to help the child to be kind to his father When you raise him right, you help him to be kind to you after that

So, neglecting the upbringing brings out children who are spoiled and disobedient to their parents. That's why our master Ali says: "May Allah have mercy on a father who has helped his son to be good." When you raise him, you help him to be good and not to be disobedient to you. So, the defect in upbringing is the cause of disobedience to parents of children. The reason is that these children are disobedient to him. There is a defect in upbringing.

And this leads to punishment from Allah to these parents who have neglected to raise their children. Allah says: "O you who believe, set yourselves and your family on fire." What does this mean? Our master Ali says: "Set yourselves and your family on fire." That is, teach them and educate them. How do you teach them on fire?

He taught them right, and he taught them right, and he taught them right He said: Teach them and educate them When the Prophet saw his wife, he lost her son in the battle, in the war, and in the captivity, her son was lost So she kept looking for him, and she was shocked Until he was full, so she embraced him and threw him away The Prophet said to her: Do you see this date that her son was in the fire? Can you imagine that you can throw your son in the fire?

They said no, the Prophet is pointing to a very important meaning for us, which is that there is no father or mother who will put his son in the fire of the world

But by mis-treating them, he is actually throwing them into the Fire of the Hereafter. When these children go out, they don't pray. When they go out, they don't know the right of God Almighty. When they go out, they are misguided, atheists, etc. All these things are the ideas that are spread now. In fact, you throw them into the Fire of the Hereafter. Therefore, the Prophet ﷺ says, "It is enough for a person to commit a sin

to lose those who are in need of them. This is enough. If a person does not commit any sins, but he loses those who are in need of him, he loses his children and does not raise them, this is enough. Some fathers have a lack of understanding. He imagines that his children's upbringing is to provide them with welfare means. He will give them good schools and take them on trips. And those who need him, he brings them to them. And the clothes are more expensive. And that's it. He raised his children.

This is a mistake in understanding. This is a mistake in education, a mistake in education is greater than a mistake in financial rights. If you didn't bring your son a new dress, in the end, the mistake in this point, I mean, you can upset the child a little, that's it. But the mistake in education, you are looking for a distorted model for society. You are looking for a distorted model for society. The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said, "It is enough for a man to be a sin to lose those who come to him." And the lack of education of children is in fact

The father who does not take care of his children, does not care about the upbringing, he is actually cursing his children The Prophet said: "A father does not curse his son" How does he curse his son? He leaves them without raising them, and his thoughts are ruined

The more successful and correct this educational process is, and the more we make the society more equipped with new models, talents, abilities and energies, the more successful the teacher is in discovering the talents of the child.

He improves the educational process, and his children are not the same as each other, of course. Their desires are different, their interests are different, their energies and abilities are different. The teacher in the kindergarten and in school is not the same. They are not the same type. He has many methods that match the levels in the class or that match his children. So he sees a good talent here. This boy has a good ability to memorize. We will help him.

to memorize the Quran and the Qur'an and so on and this boy has a good voice and this boy is good at reading and this boy is this and this boy is this and this boy is good at this and this boy has a mental ability and intelligence and a skill to solve and organize and all these things so he uses all the energy and all the efficiency in the right direction we want to strive in the society with efficiencies and energies and talents so the successful teacher is not the one who produces a copy of him

The successful teacher is the one who finds the leader and discovers the talents and abilities and instills them Therefore, the ancestors of the Prophet, may God bless them, were very interested in the matter of education And you want to imagine

The attention of the Prophet to education despite the circumstances in which they lived and enjoyed it and enjoyed it from the application of the law of God Almighty And from the spread of the manifestations of religion and the ruling of the law of God Almighty, and yet they had great interest in the matter of education So what about us in the time we are in now? The tribulations, the negativities, the desires, the suspicions and the innovation spread in it So the Prophet, may God be pleased with him, had great interest in education We said

the caliphs used to take the teachers for their children so the caliph is busy so there must be an alternative for his children that's why Imam Ibn Abi al-Dunya was called the teacher of the children of the caliphs we will talk about two situations that show how the predecessors in the Middle East were interested in raising children the caliph Al-Mansur sent a message to the people in prison he wanted to see these people deprived of what?

So he sent them a letter and said to them, "What is the most severe thing that has happened to you in the prison?" What is the most severe thing that has happened to you in the prison? If anyone in their place was saying that the prison itself is forbidden from me to go out and breathe and see the sun and so on and so forth, all these things, their answer was

When he said to them, "What is more difficult for you to pass in the prison?" They said, "We have not lost the upbringing of our children." The most sad and affected thing in this prison is that there is a gap between us and our children that we are forbidden to be the ones to raise them. We are forbidden to complete the steps that we were walking with them in. They said, "We have not lost the upbringing of our children." And the level of interest of the predecessors in the upbringing of children reached the level that some caliphs

he made a box for those who lost their money from the Muslim children he made a box and said that if someone from the children buy something and lose it, his father will not beat him he will take his place from this box now you sent your son to buy this thing he is still young, 3 or 4 years old and gave him 20 pounds he lost it, he has 20 pounds like half a pound like a pound, there is no difference between them so he lost it, you took it and put it on a respectable thing you lost the trust in it

and he is afraid to do so to buy something from the shop clear? so we say that the educational process is not just a part of the mind or a mental culture but it is a knowledge that is acquired and an art that needs skill knowledge is acquired and an art that needs skill and perfection the process of education is not enough only for the innate

Or the way of parenting the parent to the parent Or love, which is enough for the instinct Neither the way of parenting the parent to the parent nor love I will take them in detail now But some people, this topic of parenting is not in their interest at all The most important thing for him is to provide the children with money, comfort, good clothing, and that's it

So we say that your upbringing is like the upbringing of the widows. He did like one with a little cataclysm. He brings them good food and cleans them underneath. And that's it. You also do this with your children. The difference between your upbringing for widows and your upbringing for your children. Clear? And the other one has a complex ignorance. He has a complex ignorance. He does not improve the upbringing of his children. And he thinks of himself

a great expert you will find someone who is proud of his son when he is told to look at something, he will feel comfortable he thinks that he is the best in raising his children he looks at his father and feels comfortable or on the contrary, you find him to be a good example and the son is very good at it to the extent that we call him the good son

He can't do anything by himself. The girl, for example, when she reaches the age of marriage, she can't do anything in the kitchen. He thinks that he is the best. He raised him. We find these problems in marriage. You find a husband, and then he thinks that the life he lived in this father's womb is after marriage. After marriage, there is responsibility. After marriage, you became the father of this family. You became responsible for this family. Who prepared your children's food and such things?

So, from the bad upbringing of the mother to the daughter, she left her until she got married and until now, we will not say the old things, like she can't dress, she can't do this and that, until now, you find a girl, for example, who can't be a doctor, and so on. We want to fix these things, so we will not say that everything is fine. Okay? And the second part,

Consider that raising children is one of the easiest things, you don't need to do this and that, and you have lectures and books and exams, you don't need all of this. This is simpler than that. My father and mother raised me, so if I did what my father and mother did to me, I will certainly raise my children. No, your generation now is different from the generation of the

other than the generation of children, the generation is different and the way you were raised by your father or mother, it will not work now now the children and this is what happens, you will find the children of the adherents themselves you will find that he is adherent in a certain way his father was beating him for example his father was dealing with him in a certain way maybe this way was suitable in a certain time or in a certain context or with this child, it is not possible with another child so he wants to do what his father and mother were doing in him

In his children, so he finds a lot of anger from his son, and then he complains again and says, "My children don't pray, the boy doesn't do anything, the boy does this and that." Okay, but you, I mean, your understanding of education was that if you did what your parents did, your children will be like you.

Some people consider that the process of raising a child is easy and does not require any courses or lectures. They think that the instinct and the way they behave is enough in the skills of raising a child. The reality we see is that it leads to the corruption of all these issues. All these issues are considered an insult to the child.

So we say that raising a child is not to raise the parent or the mother or the teacher, his children, by only defending his love. He loves them, he loves his children. So he sees that this is enough to make him raise his children well. No, love alone is not enough. Rather, from love, what is killed. From love, what is killed. We have this teacher who works like a doctor exactly. The teacher raises children.

He is the doctor for these children in their morals and behaviors He is like the doctor for example If we assume that his son has a surgery And he knows that the one who will perform the surgery is not a doctor, but a person who loves his son Is it enough for him to perform the surgery? No, of course, and the love of the teacher alone is not enough for him to be

A successful teacher, or he will have righteous children. Clear? Also, in the process of upbringing, the instinct and the behavior are not enough. As we say, this is the reality that actually indicates the change of instinct. The instinct itself is different and the misconceptions are stuck with the parents and the children.

Misunderstandings that are not in line with the father and the son Let's take an example A father, for example, orders his son to do something He tells him, for example, "ask me" Or "remember your lessons" Or "write the homework you took today in school" Done? So he sees his son doesn't respond So he threatens him with what? With the cane So the boy responds And he is not in line with the father

The children are not allowed to have sex except for the first concept And the boy himself has a concept that his father does not speak seriously except when he says "give me the sex" Clear? So he took it by instinct So finding a concept that is complicated for him is wrong The children are not allowed to have sex So instead of telling him to do this or that, he said "I will get the sex" and he immediately took it And the boy also, his father told him to do this

he doesn't talk seriously until he gets the fever and he stays up until he gets the fever on his head so the concepts became wrong with the parents and the children let's take another example a son asks his father for something he wants certain clothes or sweets so his father asks him for a cry he finds the child crying so the son learns that crying is the way to take

The thing he wants. This is how it is established in the son. And the father. It is established in him. That he does not give this thing until he cries. He tells him about this thing. He refuses. So he cries and tells him to take it to silence him. So after that, in his mind. I do not give him anything until he cries. Until he cries to silence him. And so the son. I tell him, take it easy. He does not give me. But when he sees me crying and crying. And I break and I break and I do. And he says what?

So, we say that this way of being is wrong and at the same time, it is stuck in the same father and mother and the child himself is misunderstood. So, you find that he himself thinks that these things are true.

because he gained these experiences from dealing with children only without having the correct foundations and principles. And also, the way the father and mother were raised is not enough. Some people are trying to add to the way they were raised a sacred way. You see, this is unrealistic, unrealistic, and not applicable. And the correct way, which is not correct, is that we raise our children as they are.

Like our parents and our parents and that's it The way he put it in his mind is not before the discussion That's why we say that the truth is that the father and the mother

They should understand that the generation they will be raised in is different from the generation they will raise their children in The generation that is now the generation of tablets, laptops, channels, touch, games and all these things need the parents to encourage the use of children for these things and to be targeted So we say that we must learn the principles of children's education before raising children

And also, studying the principles and principles of raising children is a study with the intention of practical application, not just theoretical knowledge. It's not just to be a model of the principles and principles of raising children. No. He learns these things to actually apply them. And the parent and the father and the mother do not regret raising their child. The efforts he makes, of course, will not go to waste.

Even if the children do not benefit in this life, at least he took the reward from God Almighty. We say that this is not the original. What is the original? Is the reward of good? Except goodness. Some people may say, "My children are now grown up, how do I start with them?" We say, "No problem with your previous behavior, and as far as your behavior is correct, the behavior of the children is correct."

And we see this a lot When the father or mother or the teacher Starts to adjust his behavior You find the behaviors of the children automatically What?

They will be more balanced and improved Even after they grow up Some people say that their children have grown up and they are not able to change them They are not able to talk about them No, of course when they find a real change in the parents After there was a dryness, for example, there was a tenderness for the children After there was a way of promoting the children There was a way of encouraging them Of course, this will affect them as well Also, one of the importance of raising children

The nature of education is more dangerous than the nature of reading and writing The nature of education is more dangerous than the nature of reading and writing Why? The nature of education is to bring out the corrupt generations To bring out the corrupt children, girls and youth They don't know the truth nor the known And they don't deny the denied They have a life without a clear goal You find that even goals and ambitions

I mean, I couldn't imagine that a young man would think of such a stupid idea.

A very complicated thinking, all his wishes and goals in life are to enter a good restaurant and eat and that's it Is this the purpose you were created for? Of course not The first reason we say that the motherhood of education is more dangerous than the motherhood of reading and writing is that the motherhood of education brings out the generations of the corrupt And also the motherhood of education is spreading in all social classes

They are scattered in all the social classes Even in the middle of the upper class Even in the middle of the submissive Unfortunately Contrary to the mother of reading and writing The mother of reading and writing is almost restricted In the last period of time I mean, a small minority who does not know what to read and write And yet you can find someone Who does not know how to read and write And yet you find his behavior with his children is very wise and polite Contrary to the mother of education The mother of education

They are always in the middle of the high class and they think they are good teachers or engineers or university professors or teachers or something like that They think they are the best teachers and that they have reached the goal of dealing with children, no That's why we say that the nationality of education is more dangerous because it is hidden

hidden and not visible unlike the motherhood of reading and writing the mother does not know what to read and write, he is determined to himself that he does not know what to read and write but the motherhood of upbringing is hidden and not visible, he thinks he is a good teacher and he thinks he deals with his children well and in fact he is disturbing his children and he does not know why we say that the motherhood of upbringing is more dangerous than the motherhood of reading and writing for three reasons, the first reason is that the motherhood of upbringing is

The second reason is that it will spread in all groups of society even in the middle of the high class and the middle of the adherents. The third reason is that it is a non-existent secret unlike the general nature of reading and writing. This is what can be dealt with and overcome. Therefore, we say that the earlier the education is, the better its fruit is and the success is. Why do we care that the education is as early as possible?

We have a child's personality that is 95% in the first 5 years. So, how much does your child's personality look like? 95% in the first 5 years. And his personality looks like 95% in the first 5 years. After 5 years, how much do you play? Only 5%. And from 5 years to 18 years, 2%. And the rest, the remaining 3%, after 18 years.

Can you imagine that your son, when he turns 5 years old, his personality has been formed by 95%? This is a dangerous matter. The Prophet said: "Every child is born on the natural." His parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents, his parents,

To adjust behavior That's why the Prophet ﷺ was very aware of this point Imam Abu Hamid Al-Ghazali says And the child is a trust with his parents And his pure heart is a pure, pure, pure, empty from every description and image What does he say? It's empty, you don't put it in it

Surah Al-Fatihah

Surah Marya.

To the Quraish mosque. That's what I said. When the Prophet ﷺ

Yes

Yes, it's a good choice between the husband and wife. This is the beginning of parenting for children. To choose a good mother or to choose a good father for their children. What is the purpose of parenting? We have three goals from the educational goals. The first goal is to build the complete Islamic personality and to make the human being the righteous, but the righteous, the influential in society.

So when we build this complete Islamic personality We are on our way to build a special generation of Salafi Rabbani And when we build this generation, we are actually participating in building the community And this is the third goal, building the Islamic community that achieves slavery So today's children are the youth of tomorrow and the future generations The target group for us to educate is children And we said that the father and mother focus on the period in which they are formed, which is 95% Which are the first five years

And we have up to 18 years. These are what we talk about in the training. And we said after 18 years, what is this called? It is called a treatment of behavior or treatment. Okay? So, today was the importance of the training. Inshallah, the next lecture will be entitled, The Attributes of the Successful Teacher. By the will of Allah, we will be back on the second day. Subhanakallahumma Rabbana wa bihamdik. Nashahadu wa la ilaha illa anta. Mastaghfiruka wa natubu ilayk.